The Road To Heaven (Allendale Four 3)

“Anderson,” I said in a shaky breath. “You’re…here.”

“I caught an early flight. I wanted to surprise everyone.”

“Surprise…” Jackson joked, but Hayden’s expression went from shock to full-out rage. He didn’t react or respond verbally, he just walked away.

Anderson stood there silently, his jaw working in tight circles. This was not how I wanted him to find out. I stepped away from the boys and toward the fence.

“I think I’m going to go put my bags in the house,” he said, walking in the direction of the back apartment. Hayden was surely already in there—thinking god knows what.

“Anderson,” I said, running after him. The tie on my bikini slipped and I grabbed it just in time. “This isn’t how I wanted to see you again. I wanted time to talk to you—we all did.”

“We can talk later,” he said, his voice less angry than I expected. Unfortunately, anger I could deal with. Whatever he was thinking—feeling--I didn’t know, and honestly, it made it worse.

I let him go, knowing he needed a moment, and glanced back at Oliver and Jackson. They both looked worried as well, probably, realizing like I was that one stupid impulse, one dumb moment and this could be over before it even started.

40

Anderson

The door closed with a click behind me and I dropped my bags on the floor. Hayden raced across the room, a flurry of motion. His hands were full of clothing and an open suitcase sat on the floor. He dropped the pile in and went back to the closet.

“What are you doing?” The question was dumb, but I felt dumb, or dumbstruck at least.

“Going home.” He tossed in a pair of shoes and scooped up a row of medication bottles on the counter. “I can’t deal with this any longer.”

“How long has that been going on?”

“Those three?” He shook his head. “I have no fucking clue.”

“But you’re angry about it?”

“You’re not?” He laughed darkly. “I figure if anyone would blow a gasket about the three of them not only getting together behind our backs but escalating, it would be you.”

“Why me?” I asked, but I knew. The fact I wasn’t more…something…about the situation confused me as well. Anger did flit by for the slightest moment when I first rounded that corner, but something about seeing my friends that way, Heaven that way, surrounded by love and positive energy…I didn’t hate it. I kind of understood.

“You’ve never been one for change, Anderson. And what we just saw out there? That was a big fucking change.”

I pushed the game controllers off the armchair and sat down. “I think you need to calm down and we need to go back down there and talk to them—figure it out.”

“There’s nothing to figure out, man. I’m leaving. Going back home to my job, to my career, to—”

“Your girlfriend?”

Hayden inhaled sharply. “Sabine has nothing to do with this.”

“She doesn’t? Why the hell not? Because if there was the slightest chance I could ever fall in love with anyone else, I’d be with that person right now.” I laughed darkly. “You want to know why I’m not angry? Because I’ve been there. Everything bound and tied up in a twisted rage. And then that shifted into grief. Then depression and despair. I thought I was managing, but then you got hurt and Heaven came crashing back in our lives and I realized I needed to get over myself. So I spent the last few months dealing with my own issues about our relationship, about the break-up and realized anger wasn’t part of the equation. Sadness? Yep. Loneliness? Absolutely. But anger? No.”

Hayden gave me a dirty look and went into the bathroom to pack his travel bag.

“I decided to give her some space,” I said, watching him run around. “And during that time, we’ve established a relationship again. A friendship. But I came here to win b

ack her heart, hoping that you guys would be ahead of me, like you’ve always been.” I rubbed my hair and glared at Hayden, who stood before me, jaw and shoulders tight. “I’m happy to see her with Oliver and Jackson. A little surprised, but happy. And I plan on doing whatever I can to get her to forgive me and see if she’ll take me back. If they’ll all take me back.”

Hayden twisted the shirt he held in his hands, his mind absorbing everything I said. Maybe, just maybe, I’d get through and we could salvage this.

When Hayden finally spoke his voice was low, raw. “I can’t live in both worlds, Anderson. I can’t maintain the image I need to for my endorsements and be a participant in that relationship. If anyone found out about Heaven and her background and our,” he waved his hand between us, “relationship, they’d massacre her in the press. They’d massacre me.”

“That’s no way to live, Hayden.”