He gives me a wary look. “What are you doing?”
“I told you, I’m helping you.” Again, I pat the mattress. “I doubt you’re ready to actually do something like wear pajamas or fully relax, but I think you can kick off your shoes and sit next to me.”
He doesn’t look convinced but actually toes off his boots. He reaches into his deep pockets and drops several items on the bedside table with a clink. Without making eye contact, he sits on the edge of the bed. I stretch my legs out, relishing the softness of the bed. “You know, this is much more comfortable than what we have in the student dormitory.”
Slowly, Armin manages to get his entire body on the bed, causing the middle to sag. He’s huge, taking up the majority of the mattress. I shift over, trying to give him space, but there’s not much room and I find myself clinging to the edge. He eyes me with amusement.
“I don’t bite, you know.”
“Are you sure, because you’ve been sleeping on the floor like a dog.”
“Ouch.” He shifts and the whole bed jostles, making me lose my balance. I tumble toward the middle of the bed and crash into his hard frame.
We’re sunk in the middle, pulled together by gravity. My hands are pressed into his chest, feeling the hard muscle beneath his shirt. I look up. “Sorry…”
“Don’t be, like I said, I don’t bite.”
The image of his teeth sinking into my shoulder flashes in my head and a damp sweat springs up over my skin. Not now, Hildi.
Our bodies are flat against one another and I know we should move, we should really, really move, but neither of us takes the initiative.
“So this is what it’s like being in a bed.”
“It’s one way,” I admit. “Come on, this can’t be your first time.”
His eyes snap to mine and I realize the double meaning of my statement.
“No, no. Not first time, first time. Being in a bed, first time. For rest.”
“Not since I started leading my own regiment,” he says. “At best, we’d have pallets on the ground or cots. Usually, good conditions meant we slept on hay. The hard times were sleeping sitting up, resting on my sword.” He reaches out and pushes a piece of hair out of my face. “As a slave, conditions were worse, but over time they became familiar.”
“That part of your life is over, Armin. You control your destiny now.”
“Maybe, once this Crusade is over, then we’ll be done for good.”
I frown. “What do you mean?”
“We made a deal amongst ourselves that once we are successful in ending the apocalypse, we can go on our own ways. We’ll no longer be bound to one another.”
“The Legion will disband.”
He nods. Sadness flickers in his eyes. “Things will be different. So you’re probably correct, learning how to sleep in a bed is probably a good idea. We aren’t the same people we used to be.”
I reach for Armin’s hand, linking my fingers with his. “You’ll miss them?”
“The pain and torture? No, but the comradery? Yes. We’ve been together a long time, more brothers than anything else. But we’ll survive. We have no choice.”
I’m not sure how to respond to that—it’s an agreement they made without my knowledge. It makes sense. Roland is already gone. Without the bonds of a curse or the shackles of slavery, why would they stay together?
I look up at Armin’s face and to my surprise, his eyes flutter shut. I wait, and slowly his breathing evens and his fingers, still threaded with mine, relax.
I don’t know if it’s how peaceful he is or the strong lull of sleep after a long, intense day, but moments later I allow myself to follow him into sleep, taking my own advice to rest.
22
Armin
A loud knock jolts me from a deep, blissful sleep. I blink, acclimating to the dark. Camulus blessed us with vision like a night predator, which is how I see that Hildi’s body is wrapped around mine, her leg hitched over my thigh. The visual is enough to spur the blood that rushes to my cock.