“It was a big decision, and it turns out, we’re great dog owners.”
He smiled that charming, dimpled grin at me. “Amazing dog owners.”
I looked back at Amber and Ginger. “I think they’ll make good parents, don’t you?”
“Definitely.” I felt his fingers twist in my hair. “Just like we will one day.”
And there it was. The opening. The door. The question--or statement, rather. I knew this would happen once the topic was out there. I knew I’d have to deal with this.
This was the real change I wanted to tell Hayden about on the beach. This was the real reason my nerves were shot so badly I fucked Anderson in the bathroom (although, that one was definitely worth it), it was the reason behind my twice-a-day runs and everything else going on with me. I’d been looking for a diversion. A distraction. Anything not to have to face this day.
Thankfully, Jackson didn’t expect a response. Unfortunately, I knew it was because he thought I agreed with him.
Glasses were deposited in front of each seat and I took mine in hand before standing. “I’d like to make a toast—to my friends—who are going to be amazing parents. I think I can speak for everyone here that we’re so happy for you and excited about being part of this kid’s future.”
I raised my glass and everyone followed. I meant every word. I just hoped the boys would stick by me when I told them the truth about what I wanted. I hoped we’d all still be together to give the baby and our friends all the support they would need.
10
Heaven
“Dammit,” I muttered, rifling through my cosmetics counter, the drawers underneath and the cabinet on the wall. “Has anyone seen my rubbing alcohol?”
Lea popped her head around the corner of the small partition, separating the main area of the trailer from a small room in the back. “It was on the shelf yesterday.”
“What shelf?” I snapped. Sadie looked up from her bed in the corner. Yep. The cool thing about working on sets like this was the ability to bring my dog with me.
“The shelf above the worktable.”
I scanned the shelf in front of me. “It’s not there.”
Lea stopped whatever she was doing and walked over. She pushed up on her toes and reached for the shelf, plucking the container off with two fingers. She held it out. “You mean this alcohol?”
I sighed and took it. “Yes. Thank you. I swear, I couldn’t see it.”
“If it were a snake, it would have bitten you.”
“I know.” I rubbed my face. “I swear my brain is mush lately.”
She sat in a makeup chair and spun around. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.”
Her perfectly arched eyebrow rose up her forehead. “Seems like you’re kind of all over the place.”
“I’m just tired—I haven’t been sleeping great and I’ve been running a lot.” I glanced over at Sadie. “She needs a lot of exercise.”
“So that’s why you’re looking thin these days.”
I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I didn’t look particularly thin, but I did look tired. “Not with all the cake I’ve been eating. I made Oliver go to the store last night and get one from the bakery. I swear I ate half of it by myself.”
She laughed. “You didn’t.”
“I did. You think those guys eat carbs? And look like that? If anything sweet co
mes in the house, it’s up to me to eat or it gets trashed.”
“No, I hear you. I’m pretty sure AJ doesn’t eat anything but meat and eggs.” She leaned back. “So, Oliver’s getting you cakes…how are the other guys?”