Green navigates the turn and a short while later we spot the first barn. In a car, the second one would have come up quick, but in the wagon it takes a full ten minutes for the horses to trot that far. Even then it doesn’t exactly match Avi’s description. A massive tree has fallen across the road we’re supposed to turn down, and crashed through the black-shingled barn roof.
“Yikes,” Green says. “Hope no one was living there.”
The men hop out of the wagon and go check on the building. Walker and I assess the tree. Besides the fact it’s blocking the road, the uprooted base has created a hole that’s impossible for the vehicle to get around.
“We’ll have to leave the wagon here,” Walker says.
“Yeah, I was just thinking that, too,” I say. “But we can take the horses, they can carry the supplies.”
I look back over my shoulder. Jane is sitting in the back of the wagon with the goods Avi packed for the Mennonites. She has her own small black case she carried with her from The Fort.
I’m impressed to see that she’s got her gun out for once and seems alert. Walker stares at her for a minute and says quietly, “She’s changed a lot.”
“Since the training?” I have to admit she did better than I expected, quickly picking up the skills we shared. She’s fast, and her accuracy in shooting and throwing is better than expected.
“Well, yes, but since we left Augusta, too. She and Avi are so…” she grapples for a word.
“In love?”
Walker flashes me a smile. “Yeah, I guess so. It changes people I guess.”
“It does have a way of making you a little less self-absorbed. She definitely needed that. What about you and Jackson. What’s going on with that?” I know she spends the night out sometimes and she’s not on any kind of guard or patrol duty. I know, but I haven’t mentioned it.
She shrugs. “He’s nice to hang around with. It gets lonely out here. As scary as it is
to connect with someone, I think it’s necessary.”
Her words ring true and once upon a time I agreed, but my heart can’t take another loss like the one with Cole. I know for certain that my brain can’t handle another complicated man like Wyatt. I gave romance in the apocalypse a shot. It didn’t turn out well.
I tell her, “I’m happy for you. You both deserve a little joy out here.”
She smiles and looks at her shoes, “I’m not sure I’d call it joy but it’s definitely a release.”
I wrinkle my nose. “TMI, dude. TMI.”
Jackson and Green emerge from the vine-covered barn and I feel a sharp jab in my side. Walker nods at them men. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you. Have you thought about it?”
“He’s a cool guy.”
“A cool guy?” She stares at me like I have three heads.
I look at this woman who has become a friend. Her face is innocent but the whole conversation is making my stomach hurt. I’ve spent months pushing the men from my past out of my mind. The odds of seeing either of them again are slim. I don’t want to see Cole, that’s for sure. Even though I have a million questions I can’t handle seeing him like that. Inhuman.
And Wyatt? Just thinking about him makes my body do strange things. My brain screams run while everything else prickles with excitement and extremely complex feelings. Most of all I never want to see him again because I hope he’s safe and happy somewhere. That he took the kids and disappeared into the woods and built a life away from the violence of the Hybrid war I know must be raging down south.
Walker taps me on the arm, eyes flashing toward Green. “You didn’t answer my question.”
As though he senses us talking about him, Green catches my eye and gives me a small smile. He’s genuine and easy. So easy. There’s no dangerous past or lies holding him together.
“Maybe one day,” I tell her.
Understanding and concern flickers in her eyes. “They’re gone, you know. It’s okay to move on. I mean, it’s almost like we have to learn how to do relationships differently now.”
“I know,” I reply, returning Green’s smile. “That’s what makes it harder.”
Chapter 14
We strap the supplies that will fit to the backs of the horses. The rest we cover in the back of the wagon and stash it in the ramshackle barn. Hopefully some members of the community will be able to return with us to collect it before we go back to Catlettsburg.