Unwritten Law (Steele Brothers 1)

“Do you really want to know this stuff?” he asks.

I shrug. “It’s three a.m. I’m just trying to stay awake for you.”

“Go to sleep. I’ll be fine.”

“Now that you’re not answering, it makes me more interested. What happened? Been cheated on? Lied to?”

He shakes his head. “No, nothing like that. I guess my problem is it always fizzles out. Like I get bored. I had two relationships that lasted about a year but knew a few months in it was never going to last. In the end, we decided we were better off as friends. But that didn’t happen. Never saw either of them after that. The last relationship I had was the girl I was with when Anders was attacked. It was probably my worst breakup. She said the attack fucked us both up and she couldn’t deal with Anders turning up at my apartment at all hours of the night. She said he was too dependent on me and basically asked me to choose between her and my brother.”

“Whoa. And she called you fucked up?”

“It’s a bit of a long story. I tried to make it work. Tried so hard to make both Anders and Olivia happy, but that was impossible. When I started staying at Anders’ place, she thought I was cheating on her and neglecting her. She never said the words it’s me or him, but that’s the choice I had in the end. She left when I told her Anders was moving in with me.”

“That’s messed up, man.”

“It’s okay. It was better to find out when I did than if we’d gotten married or something. And again, I wasn’t all that cut up about it ending. I dunno. I’ve never had that person. The one, or whatever you want to call it. I think it’s a load of shit. The person you end up with is just a person you can tolerate for long periods of time.”

I burst out laughing. “Yeah, but putting that into marriage vows isn’t as poetic as saying it was meant to be.”

Law lets out a less than dignified “Pfft.”

I sigh. “I thought I had it once. Shit, I paid for the guy to fly to Europe to meet my sister, it was that serious. I had visions of a civil ceremony, little adopted babies running around everywhere … fuck, I was an idiot.”

And I haven’t really thought much about Ben since I moved to Carindale. Back home, his ghost wouldn’t leave me alone. I’d lived with him, so even when he left me, his memory was still there. The small kitchen to my childhood home no longer haunted me with memories of Mum cooking us food and packing our school lunches but with Ben making coffee in his underwear with an adorable smile on his face.

I hate that smile now.

I had to get out of there. Unable to bring myself to sell the house, I rented it out, and the rent pays off the remaining mortgage for us. That, and Evie would kill me if I sold our house that was technically both of ours, even if prior to moving out, I was the only one contributing to the repayments.

I don’t think I could live there again, even if I do move home eventually. Everywhere, I saw Ben and relived the heartache. The confusion. I wondered what I did wrong and what I could’ve done better. It took me a few months of thinking the problem was me before realising Ben was just a dick. What I saw in him, I’ll never know. Heck, even my fuck buddy situation with Anders is healthier than what I had with Ben. That’s saying something, because I still can’t work out Anders’ deal. Or my current deal with his brother.

“What happened?” Law asks.

I hesitate for a second, because I don’t really want to get into it. But Law gave a big piece of himself tonight when he talked about what he and Anders went through, and that’s a whole lot worse compared to my pathetic breakup. “It started out small. The lying. Like, he’d always say he had no money when it turns out he did. He made me pay for everything, while he saved up his money for a new car or a holiday he didn’t invite me on. He said he was visiting his mother when he was going out with his friends and didn’t want me to come.”

“What the fuck?”

“When I confronted him, he blamed me. Said I was too smothering or whatever. Said I can’t be alone and am clingy and thinks it has to do with my parents’ death. After they died, my sister took off, and I’d been alone ever since. And then when I met Ben, I … I guess I was scared he’d leave too.”

Law’s brow furrows. “That doesn’t sound like you at all. I mean, the way you asked for us to be friends was a little weird—”