Blindsided (Fake Boyfriend 4)

If I’m honest with myself, no. I’m not where I should be, and I’m nowhere near where I was this time last year leading into training camp, but like I’ve been doing with Talon, I keep face. “I’ll make sure I’m ready.”

Because what else can I say? What else can I think? I can rehab for another year and hope to be picked up next season as a free agent when my contract runs out, or I can beg and plead with the Warriors’ management team to sign me again, but I need to show them I’ll be physically capable of doing the job.

“I’m depressing you,” Lennon says. “Sorry.”

“All good.” I glance over at Talon again, and he nods toward Lennon with a smile. Guess he approves then.

* * *

Something doesn’t feel right. I don’t know what, but I wake with a knot in my stomach and the dreaded feeling that what we’re doing today is too soon. Or wrong. Or we haven’t thought it through properly.

I tell myself it’s nerves. Coming out to the world is a big deal, and we didn’t think it was going to happen this soon. Or at all. I mean, it’s not like we’re actually coming out today—we’re just doing an interview that Lennon is supposed to sit on until we’re okay with releasing it. But Talon went from talking about doing it in years to doing it soon, and now it feels like it’s right this second. I’ve been hesitant but on board, but I’m wondering if that’s only because it’s been an idea, not an actual plan. Maybe I’ve been thinking it wasn’t going to happen at all. Because faced with the reality of it, it’s becoming too much.

Too much pressure. Too much of a risk. Just … too much too soon.

Damon and Talon’s agent, Alan, have organized for our interview to happen in a hotel suite in Manhattan, and it’s all been very hush-hush. I don’t think Lennon even knows why he’s coming today.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Talon’s agent asks him. I want to answer No, I’m not! But he’s not talking to me. They’re huddled in the corner of the high-end hotel room whispering to each other as if I can’t hear them. Newsflash: I can. And their conversation makes the knot in my stomach tighten. “This is risky.”

Talon turns to glare at him, and Alan throws up his hands.

“Okay, fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. This doesn’t affect Miller as much as it does you. You have further to fall. You’ve already pissed off some major endorsements with your ‘scheduling conflict.’ Meanwhile, you’ve been sitting on your ass training a lost cause.”

Now I can taste bile. Nice. Talon blew off endorsement deals for me? I suspected as much, because huge stars like Talon generally have a busier schedule off season than when we play. Hearing it for a fact makes it worse—like it’s the actual truth instead of an insecurity I can try to rationalize and dismiss.

“Last I checked, I pay you to support my decisions,” Talon says through gritted teeth.

“You pay me to do what’s best for you.”

“For my career, you mean. Having Miller on the field with me is what’s best for my career. You need to remember that.”

There’s a knock at the door, and Damon lets Lennon in.

“Thanks for coming.”

Lennon smiles at him. “No problem. What’s with all the secre—”

He stops short when he sees Talon approach me and land his ass on the ornate love seat next to me. I was reluctant to sit on it at first in fear of breaking it. It doesn’t look like it can hold me, let alone Talon as well. Its flimsy legs still unnerve me.

Lennon’s blue eyes shine bright behind his thick-framed glasses.

“This is all top secret for now, but I know I can trust you,” Damon says.

“Of course.” Lennon’s glance flits between Talon and me. “But can someone tell me straight up what’s going on? Because I think I’m jumping to all the wrong conclusions here, seeing as I’ve just been hired to write about LGBTQ players, and now I’m about to sit down with the biggest quarterback in the league and his college roommate. I’m trying not to salivate over here.”

Damon claps his back. “You’re not far off the mark.”

Talon reaches for my hand. “Miller and I … we’re … well … our story is kinda complicated.”

“Not that complicated,” I say. “I’ve wanted him since we were teenagers, and I thought I’d never get him.”

Lennon’s hand goes to his heart. “Aww. This is so awesome.”

“Rules,” Damon interjects. “They can refuse to answer any question you ask, and Alan and I can object as well. This article is not to hit the stands until we give you approval, but it might have to be released at short notice if this gets out before we planned it. That’s the only reason you’re getting advance warning about this, and you’re the only interview we’ve approved.”