“It’s cool. Your friends are great. I was worried they’d be dicks.”
“Because I’m one?” Maddox asks incredulously.
“Maybe.” It’s more like straight guys make me edgy, but I don’t want to get into that with Maddox.
“Challenge accepted. I’m gonna have to work harder at proving to you I’m a decent guy.”
This should be fun.
***
At one in the morning, my feet don’t want to cooperate as we stumble into Maddox’s parents’ house. We’re both tipsy, but he seems more in control of his motor functions than I am. Maddox bought me round after round, trying to prove that makes him a good guy. Don’t know how it worked, but it did. That guy is awesome. And hot.
No, not hot. Maybe I’m more than tipsy.
Jared ended up driving us home in Maddox’s rental car, and then Will picked up Jared. They spent half the night trying to get laid instead of drinking. They both struck out, but it was fun to watch and bet on the outcome. Although, I owe Maddox twenty bucks now. I thought for sure Will would’ve hooked one of them.
“So, Maddy, huh?” I joke as we head up to bed. I try not to stare at Maddox’s ass two steps ahead of me. When I give in, I stumble and almost fall flat on my face on the stairs. I right myself and keep talking as if I didn’t nearly crash land to the ground. “I like Irish better.”
Maddox appears to miss my contortionist act of trying to stay upright. “Irish isn’t a good nickname in this household. All of us would respond. Well, except Mom.”
“Point taken.”
“But if you tell Stacy everyone calls me Maddy, I may have to kill you, Dik.”
As soon as we reach our bedroom, I’m aware of him and every step he takes. I turn my back and try to ignore the urge to check him out when the sound of his belt buckle echoes in my ear.
“It doesn’t have to be weird,” Maddox says, and clothes hit the ground with a soft thump.
“It’s not weird.” My voice cracks and I force myself to clear my throat. “Okay, it’s a little weird.” I stare at him over my shoulder and try to smile, but holy shit, the guy has abs. Quickly, I look away again.
He’s straight. He’s straight. He’s straight.
He hates baseball. He hates baseball. He hates baseball.
I take off my shoes and socks, drop my jeans to the floor, and climb into bed next to him, making sure I face the opposite direction.
“I’m sorry,” Maddox says.
“Seriously, stop apologizing. I signed up for this. You didn’t sign up for sharing a bed with your gay boyfriend, so it’s probably best if I face this way.”
“I know this is weird, and I don’t know why you think I’m some close-minded asshole, but I honestly don’t have issues with you sleeping next to me. And without sounding totally sleazy here, you can get comfortable, and I won’t care.”
“You know what a lot of guys say when they find out you’re gay?” My voice is quiet, and I still refuse to face him.
“I have an idea, yeah. I broke up with Chastity a week before leaving for college. That’s a week of small-town opinions being shoved down my throat.”
“Nah, I’m not talking about the full-on homophobes. I’m talking about the guys who act like they’re totally okay with it, and then throw in a ‘so long as you promise to never hit on me.’ I got it a lot in college. Locker rooms were a nightmare. My eyes stayed firmly on the ground, because God forbid someone thinks you’re checking them out while they’re naked.”
“Are you saying you never check out straight guys?”
I let out a sad laugh. “You check out girls on the street and in clubs? It’s human nature. But when it comes to these types of situations where clothes are … minimal, rest assured, the majority of us won’t stare, okay?”
“Okay. I get it, but I want you to know I won’t freak out if you look.”
I smile.
“Night, Dik.”
“Night, Irish.”
***
After a long night of putting up with Maddox snoring, moaning, and talking in his sleep, I wake up alone. I also wake up late. It’s ten a.m. according to the bedside clock. In my defense, sleeping next to a hot guy who’s moaning is impossible. At one point, I contemplated jerking off in the bathroom to make me pass out but decided against it. I don’t want to be that guy—jerking off to straight guy moans in his parents’ bathroom. That’s sadder than I ever want to be.
And yet, you were so close to doing it. Again. Like when Eric—
My conscience likes to remind me of how pathetic I’ve been in the past, and I’m not going to make the same mistakes with Maddox that I did with Eric. No fucking way.