Thorned Heart (Cash Me Outside 2)

Everyone else has long gone to bed, but I could stay out here forever. Or until the fire dies out and we start freezing to death—literally.

I kiss the top of his head. “Christmas tomorrow.”

“Mmhmm,” he says sleepily.

“Maybe we should go to bed so Santa can come.”

“Is that my nickname now? You want to go upstairs so Santa can come?”

“Only you can turn the sanctity of Christmas into something dirty.”

“It’s a gift, but for real, if you want to go to bed and fuck me, I’ll take one for the team. It will be soooo hard.”

“It’s late, and you’re tired rambling. What if we went to bed and fell asleep instead?”

“Fine. Christmas morning blowjob then.”

I huff. “Sure, baby. Whatever you want.”

He turns his head to look up at me. “What do you want?”

“Honestly, this.” I tighten my arms around him. “Don’t get me wrong, the sex is amazing, and I want more, but I enjoy holding you just as much.”

His lips brush against mine, and his beard tickles my skin.

“I’ve never had that before,” he admits softly.

“I can give you more than sex. You’re worth more than that, Seb.”

Seb’s dark eyes close, and he nuzzles into my neck. I pretend I don’t feel the wetness on my skin because he won’t appreciate me calling him out for crying even if it’s to point out his feelings are perfectly valid and I’m sorry for every asshole who has used him in his life.

“Let’s go to bed,” I whisper, and he nods against me.

We stumble upstairs and strip each other down. I kiss his skin and run my hands all over him, and even though I’m hard as hell and love Seb’s naked body, I’d rather feed him reassurance than my cock.

We lie in each other’s arms, and I don’t plan to let him go all night. He falls asleep fast, his breathing evening out, but like I have for the last few nights, I stay awake, basking in the surrealness of having Seb by my side.

He murmurs something in his sleep, but I can’t make it out.

“What was that?”

“Love you,” he mumbles.

My heart explodes all over again. We haven’t used the L word again since we first admitted our feelings for each other. Honestly, I’ve been scared to.

There’s a difference between admitting I’m in love with him in an abstract concept and saying those three little words that mean the world. Even though I’m ninety-five percent sure he’s asleep and isn’t aware of what he’s saying, I kiss the top of his head and say, “I love you too.”

I don’t think I’ve been this excited to wake up on Christmas since I was a kid. I’m looking forward to my wake-up blowjob, but that falls apart when Cash runs through the house like the child he is, screaming, “It’s Christmas, bitches!”

Hmm, a child who swears a lot.

“I guess that means we’re being summoned to the tree,” I say.

Seb groans. “Mm, five more minutes, Mom.”

“Come on. I’m eager to open my brand new watches you guys always seem to get me every year.”

Seb smiles but doesn’t open his eyes. “We really should’ve learned to coordinate by now.”

It’s kind of become a running joke. The first time it happened, our first Christmas together, the band had just hit it big and they had money to burn. I got four Rolexes. Now they do it just to fuck with me, and each year, it’s as if they try to outdo each other in getting me the most gaudy and expensive, diamond encrusted thing they can find. Each year there’s a winner for ugliest watch.

It’s ridiculous, but I still own all of them even though I never wear them.

We get up and put on sweats. On my way out of the room, Seb says he’ll meet me downstairs.

I find Locke in the kitchen getting coffee for everyone while the rest of the band is sitting on the floor near the tree. Cash is even wearing a Santa hat he pulled from God knows where.

None of us are with our blood relatives this year, but there’s no other place I’d rather be than with our band family.

I sit with the guys, and Seb comes down not long later and takes his spot next to me.

“Where’s your groupie?” I ask Jasper.

“I told her to sleep in considering I don’t have a present for her. It would be awkward for her to sit here while we’re all giving each other gifts.”

I shake my head at him. “You didn’t think to go buy her something?”

“Oh. Right. That probably would’ve been a good idea,” Jasper says.

I laugh. “You’re all clueless.”

“Hey, I’m not.” Cash jumps up to reach for the first present and hands it to Locke.

“Wow. I guess fiancé beats best friend,” Seb says dryly.

“Yep.” Cash has no remorse whatsoever.

“I can fix that.” I lean forward to get the present I put together for Seb.