I never realized that’s how Shannon saw me.
Shannon steps forward. “Please don’t rule out a future with him. You basically did that with us the minute we got back from venturing the world, and look where it got you. I love you, and I always will, but we both deserved better. Don’t let anything get in the way of what you want.”
They don’t understand.
They may understand me, but Cash’s life … it’s not something you can just tag along for the ride. It’s not a normal life.
I scoff. Then again, the idea of a “normal life” is what made me run off to Europe to begin with.
“I should get back to him.”
Shannon nods, but I feel their judging stare all the way back.
Some small dude is trying to dance with Cash, but my man is standing there oblivious. His focus is only on me.
And when I get close, he pushes past the other guy.
Then his mouth is on mine, hot and demanding, and I’m so not complaining.
“Who was that?” he asks when he finally pulls back.
“Wha? I can’t even remember my name after that kiss.”
He stares up at me with heat in his eyes. “Ready to call it a night?”
Something Shannon said about telling Cash the truth before I sleep with him pings in my brain, and while that ship sailed two orgasms ago, maybe they have a point.
“How about we drink some more?” I ask.
I expect him to protest, but he doesn’t.
Maybe Cash can sense the shift in me since running into Shannon, or maybe I’m reading into it.
So, we drink.
A lot.
Damn, this guy can put them away.
I mean, it makes sense. He’s a rock star.
Still. How has he not ended up with alcohol poisoning at some point in the last ten years?
He chuckles when he sees how glassy-eyed I am. “You’re soooo drunk.”
I smile. “You don’t sound so sober yourslef.”
“Yourslef, hey?” Cash’s hand runs down my chest. “You’re so hot. You always were.”
I’m pretty sure he’s the only person who found my lanky, fair-skinned, and freckled body hot in high school, but I don’t care about that. I’ve only ever cared that he saw me that way.
“Let’s go dance again,” I say, but when I try to stand, my legs don’t seem to work anymore. “Shit.” I grab the edge of the bar to hold myself up, but it doesn’t work too well.
Arms come around me, and I lock eyes with my savior.
Cash laughs. “And you’re so adorable when you’re drunk.”
“It’s so unfair,” I whine.
“What is?” Cash asks.
“Timing. Courage … Life.”
“And I think it’s time we get you out of here.”
“’Kay.”
But instead of leading me to the elevators to go upstairs, Cash leads me outside the club and casino and onto the street.
Cash pushes me against the side of the building so he’s not the only one holding me up.
I lean back, resting my head against the brick.
The millions of people on the street don’t pay mind to us. This is Vegas. There are more drunk people than sober.
I laugh. “You’re a bad influence. I can’t keep up.”
“Dude, the guys in my band can’t keep up.” He rubs his stomach. “Although, it’s sitting weird in my gut. It probably got used to the break I had, and now it doesn’t know what the fuck is going on.”
Once I get some fresh air—er, some Vegas air—into me, I feel more stable and a little less emo.
“Get wasted at a bar. We can check that off what we wanted to do way back when.”
Cash laughs. “Guess so.” He shoves his hands in his tight pockets. “You want to tell me who that … person was?”
I cock my head. “How’d you know they were enby?”
“I didn’t. But by the look of them, I didn’t want to assume gender.”
“They usually get ‘What are you?’ Pisses them off. People have no tact.”
“You’re not answering the question.”
I let out the loudest sigh known to man. “Because I don’t want to.”
“They’re an ex, I’m guessing?”
I rub my chest. “This will change everything.”
He stumbles back. “Oh God, are you still together? Was this, like, some fucked-up famous hall pass or something?”
Cash looks absolutely horrified, and it breaks my heart he could think that of me.
“No.” I lunge for him. And miss. Because my balance is all skewed. I manage to grab his wrist. “I swear, it’s not that. We’re not together. Not anymore.”
He sags in relief.
“But … we are still married.”
Cash pulls out of my grasp. “You’re fucking married?”
“Separated. Divorce papers are signed and everything. It just hasn’t been finalized because we got married in the Netherlands, not here, and there was a lot of red tape.”
I have no idea if my words are coming out right. I have a feeling they’re a slurred mess.
“Cashton, please …”
He stares at me with hurt in his eyes. “You got married. Married!”