Goal Lines & First Times (CU Hockey 3)

Foster’s had more ice time this season than any of us would have thought.

I throw my bag in the trunk of Seth’s car and go to get in his passenger seat when Zach grins up at me through the window.

I lift my head and stare across the top of the car at my boyfriend. “Really? Even boyfriend status won’t give me the front seat this trip?”

“Shotgun rules.” Seth shrugs.

“Oh, so that’s how it’s going to be, is it?”

“At least you don’t have Jacobs and Beck this time.”

“True. I might lie down and take a nap.” Like that’s actually possible though.

I’m buzzing about staying in the same hotel as on New Year’s and reliving every first-time experience I had with Seth in that room.

First time exploring another man’s body. First time acknowledging with actions that I’m bisexual. But the most important one, the first time I’ve ever looked at someone and wanted more. Wanted a future.

Graduation is only a couple of months away, and I still have no job prospects or any idea what I’m going to do, but I do know I want to stay in Vermont. Going home and working in my dad’s bait shop feels like a waste of my degree, but I don’t exactly know what kind of jobs there’ll be in Burlington for me either. For a job in sports media, I’d have to look at maybe moving to a big city. Or at least one with a damn sports team. I’ve been looking, and I’ve sent off a few resumes for jobs I’m not really excited about, but there’s slim pickings for a media relations job here in any field. Forget sports.

Seth will still be at UVM doing his master’s, then maybe his PhD before he’ll have the option of getting a job at a university somewhere.

The thought of doing a graduate program turns my stomach, because I’m not cut out for theoretical work. I’m lucky to maintain my C-grade average to stay on the team.

The drive up north starts out with excitement, but with all the future chatter going on in my brain, by the time Seth pulls into the hotel, I’m a little flat.

“You okay?” Seth asks when we grab our bags.

“Yep. Just … long drive.”

“You weren’t the one driving.” He chuckles.

“What can I say, looking this good doing nothing is exhausting.”

Seth cups my cheek. “But you do it so well.”

“I know, right?”

We check in and dump our bags—it’s not the same room as last time but still has the same amazing view: Seth. Oh, and I guess the city is pretty too. Then we have to drive Zach to Foster’s apartment to drop his stuff off before heading to the arena for tonight’s game.

I, of course, get food first and meet the guys at our seats.

While we wait for the game to start, I lean over and talk to Zach. “So, when are you moving here?”

“I’ve applied for a PhD program, which means I’ll be moving here over the summer if my thesis is accepted at CU.”

“Which it will be. It’s brilliant,” Seth says.

Zach blushes.

“Cool.” Yet another person who has their future mapped out.

Am I the only one who doesn’t have a plan? Jacobs and Beck are planning their hockey camp, and while I’m tempted by their offer to do it with them and flattered they even considered me, I don’t think coaching is the right path for me to take.

Seth cuddles into my side as the lights go dark and the teams are introduced. There’s a preshow introducing a team of six-year-olds facing off the Montreal goalie in a shootout. It’s fucking adorable.

After the ceremonial puck drop and the national anthems, the game gets underway. And exactly like he does on his couch at home, Seth cheers louder for his brother than anyone else in the room. That’s adorable too.

Somewhere in the second period, Seth leans in closer to me. “Are you ever sad when you watch hockey?”

“What’s there to be sad about?”

“That you didn’t make it?”

I shrug. “Yes and no. I worked my ass off to be the best player I could be, but it just so happens, that wasn’t good enough. Not everybody gets to have their dream, and that’s okay. It’s as simple as finding my backup.”

“Coaching could be your backup?”

“It could. I like the glitz of the games though. The atmosphere. If I could get paid to watch every game of professional hockey live, I wouldn’t care what I’d do. Hell, I will be a janitor if it means I get front-row seats.”

Seth snorts. “I think front-row seats are above a janitor’s pay grade. Plus, they’d be working during games.”

I wave him off. “True, but you know what I mean.”

“So, you want a league job?”

“Maybe …” But a league job could literally send me anywhere, far away from Vermont. The closest teams are Montreal and Boston, but they’re still hours away from Burlington where Seth will be.