Goal Lines & First Times (CU Hockey 3)

“Having a boyfriend won’t actually affect my chances, will it? I mean, Foster’s on the team, and he hasn’t had any issues. I assumed—”

“Sorry. You threw me is all,” she says as if she can read my mind. “I knew Foster Grant was …” A concentration line appears above her brow as if she’s searching for the right terminology.

“I believe he identifies as bi. Same as me. And his brother.” I mean, technically Seth is pan and demi, but she seems to be struggling with the basics, and hell, I understand that. I was there not that long ago.

“It’s not going to be a problem, is it?”

Her mouth drops open. “Oh, God no. Perfectly welcome. We’re an inclusive league. I guess the stereotype is completely wrong.”

“Sometimes, yeah.”

Amy stands. “Well, I think I have enough. I have a few more interviews today, and we’ll probably let the right candidate know in a couple of days.”

I stand and shake her hand. “Thank you for your time and for giving me a chance after that disaster of a phone call.”

“It sounded like you were busy.”

“I was dealing with a college playoff quarterfinal with an injured teammate and another one with food poisoning. It was messy.”

Understanding crosses her face. “Ah. That’ll do it. How did you do in the game?”

“Lost in spectacular fashion.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

I shrug. “It was time to hang up the skates. I mean, I’m still going to skate, but it’ll be for fun.”

“That’s a good outlook to have. I’ll get in touch soon.”

I leave the interview feeling lighter than ever, but as I leave the arena, I try to imagine my life here. Amy’s right that I will have Foster and Zach. I wouldn’t be moving to a city where I knew no one. And I make friends easy. But, the thing is, I’d want Seth here too. If he can’t transfer his credits and move with me, I don’t know if I could accept the job if it was offered.

I can still have hockey in so many different ways. Coaching, watching … I don’t think I’ll ever find another Seth.

Being midweek, I drove up here myself even though Seth wanted to come with me for moral support. I check my phone to see I’ve missed a good luck text from him and a follow-up asking if I was still in the interview with that’s a good sign!

I text him back: Just got out. I think it went well but won’t know for sure for a few days. Catching up with your brother now.

Call him a loser from me! he texts back.

We watched his disaster of a game last night, and Seth says he has to revel in it because it’s rare Foster’s ego gets a chance to be taken down a peg or two.

Brothers. I don’t understand it.

I jump in my car and head toward Foster’s apartment to have lunch before driving back to Colchester. He looks exhausted when he opens his door.

“Uh, Seth told me to tell you you’re a loser.”

Foster bursts out laughing. “Of course he did.”

“Getting kicked out of the playoffs sucks, right?”

“Yep.” He steps aside to let me in.

“Hey, at least you have next season.”

Foster leads me to his kitchen where he pours water for us. “True.” He leans against the counter. “Have you ever thought of going to some ECHL tryouts? Or trying your chance as a free agent?”

“You don’t think I’ve already explored those routes? Accepting that I’m good at hockey but not good enough is something I’ve been dealing with since freshman year.”

“How did the job interview go?”

“Really good. I think. But …” It’s hard to word this without bitching out his brother.

“But?”

I run a hand through my hair. “Did Seth tell you he sent my resume to you without even telling me?”

Foster’s eyebrow quirks. “He what?”

“So, when you mentioned the job, I was adamant on not going for it because I want to stay in Vermont with your stupid brother.”

He cracks a smile. “Seth is soooo stupid.”

No, he’s really not, but ugh.

“He felt guilty about keeping me back, so instead of telling me to go for it and offering to move with me if I got it, he just … decided to apply for me. Without telling me.”

Foster winces. “If it makes you feel any better, Seth’s always got other people’s best interests at heart.”

“That’s the worst part! I want to be mad because he crossed a line, but I know he did it for me, so it’s like I can’t still be pissed anymore.”

Foster doesn’t say anything, and guilt kicks in.

“Sorry. I shouldn’t talk about Seth with you.”

“Why not?”

“Because bitching about him isn’t fair. He has said he’d move for me, so I can’t really be mad at him.”

“That doesn’t negate what he did. I know my brother inside and out, but sometimes his good intentions aren’t really thought through. Everyone sees Zach as the oblivious adorable man he is, but I think people miss that Seth can be as socially inept sometimes. He’s a people pleaser, so he does what he thinks is best as some sort of grand gesture. This isn’t the first time he’s screwed up with someone.”