I dunno how it’s possible to be dreading and anticipating something so much.
The vote isn’t even on my radar, because like Beck, I know how it goes. I want this to be over with. I want to tell people and let them get their reactions out of the way so we can be Beck-and-Jacobs without input from anyone else.
Motherfucker, I think my hands are actually shaking. I want to laugh, at myself, at Beck, at this whole situation because it’s so dramatic and ridiculous and why the hell didn’t we just walk around for the day holding hands so the news would spread and it would be out there? That would have been the simple option.
Instead I’m sitting here, afraid of … what?
A laugh jumps out, and I quickly run a hand down my face to stifle it. Beck shoots me a look, and I’m about to tell him how dumb this all is, when Coach walks in.
The whole mood of the room changes.
“Vote time!” Cohen says, rubbing his hands together.
Coach chuckles. “Sorry, team. There’s been a little change of plans.”
Umm, what?
I go to exchange confused looks with Beck, but he’s still staring at Coach Hogan. Surely, surely they’re not going to take it from us after how hard we worked this summer.
“So … what’s going on?” I finally ask.
Coach smiles. Then he lifts a navy-and-silver jersey and throws it my way. I catch it purely on reflex, and when I look down, I’m sure there must be some mistake.
A giant silver C stares back at me.
“Wha—”
“Team, Jacobs is our new captain.”
“But—”
Coach holds up a second jersey and tosses it to Beck. “And this year, we have an alternate. Congratulations, boys. You worked hard for this.”
I’m still completely numb as I quickly turn to Beck, sure he’s going to be as stunned as I am. Instead, he’s smiling.
Smiling.
“What did you do?”
Beck smirks as he takes the jersey from my loose grip and tugs it over my head. “I made sure things went the way they were supposed to.”
I dumbly shove my arms through the sleeves as Beck tugs on his own, lit up like he’s the one who was named captain.
But I get it.
Because up until a minute ago, I’d been perfectly happy not to have the C if it meant he’d be wearing it. A few months ago, I never would have believed it. A few months ago, it was captain or bust.
Now, none of it matters without him because his happiness is more important than mine.
And apparently, it goes both ways.
That gross, sappy feeling returns, and I can finally pinpoint exactly what it is.
I’m in love with my Teddy Beckett.
I stand up and tug him to his feet. Before I know what I’m doing, I kiss him. It’s soft and tentative, but then I cup his face and put as much passion into it as I can, without going overboard. My heart is in my throat, and I’m overly conscious of how silent everyone has gone around us.
Beck breaks the kiss and pulls me into a tight hug. “You could have given a guy some warning,” he tries to joke, but his voice is all thick.
“Like you can talk.”
“I fucking knew it!”
I miss whose voice it is, but before I can turn, someone slams into my back. I immediately brace for a fight, but then … arms close around us. And another set from Beck’s side. Then another, and another.
Are … are they hugging us?
“The fuck?” I breathe.
Beck turns his face into my neck as I feel the ghost of a laugh against my skin. “This is—”
“Ridiculous?”
He nods, but neither of us make a move to end it.
“Okay, assholes, sucking up to the captains isn’t going to get you out of a nasty practice next week,” Beck says.
“And I don’t share, so get your hands off my man.”
Someone laughs, and then Rossi yanks me into a headlock and ruffles my hair. “This is taking gay chicken a bit far, guys.”
Beck shrugs. “You set me a challenge, I’m going to follow through.”
“All right,” Coach says, finally stepping in. “That’s enough excitement for one meeting. We have work to do.”
I shove Rossi off me, and Cohen pats my shoulder while the few other guys who joined the group hug take their seats again.
And even though I can feel the stares of some of the guys who might not approve, it doesn’t do anything to dim my happiness.
Beck reaches over and takes my hand as Coach walks us through game tape from last season, and I’m even more keen for this season to begin than any other.
Because Beck and I have got this.
We’re a team.
And we’re going to prove we’re unbeatable.
30
Beck
Fuck, I love being on the ice.
I always have.
But this year is different.
The shift happens during our first practice. I’ve always had this pull toward the game, and for the first time since I started playing, a future in it is not only possible but within reach.