“Why didn’t you come for me?” There. I asked the question that’s been like an albatross around my neck.
He doesn’t let go. If anything, he pulls me tighter. His breath kisses my flat stomach.
“Why didn’t I come for you?” he repeats slowly. “You were eighteen. I guess I felt that you’d be better off without me. I had all that shit with Renee and my mom to deal with. And you didn’t trust me.”
I pull back so I can look at him, see him. “Why would you think anything changed?”
He leans back and cocks his head.
“Hasn’t it?”
I shake my head no. “I waited for you like a fucking…” I throw my hands up, searching for the word. “Like a stupid girl who sat and cried in the Disciples’ clubhouse because I couldn’t get up and I couldn’t bear to… go on.”
“You needed to go to school.” He pushes me back to stand, but fuck that. He doesn’t get to walk away. He thinks he can simply write a song and that makes eight years just vanish and everything’s all right?
I grab his arm and he turns, his brown eyes filled with a pain no one wants, one that’s hard to get rid of.
“Don’t you ever tell me I run. Look at you.” The tears that I’ve been holding back seem unstoppable, but I couldn’t care less.
“What the fuck do you want me to say, Gia?” he yells. “I fucking love you. Always have. But that day, I begged you to trust me. I told you that kid wasn’t mine.”
“You never came for me. You let me go,” I yell back. “And you’re right. I was only eighteen. I still believed in love and soulmates and all that crap. But beyond that, I believed in you.”
He looks down at my hand that won’t let go of him. If I do, that will be it. I’ll leave this room and won’t come back.
“That was mistake number one. You, out of everyone, know I always make all the girls cry.” My hand drops as his words float around the room.
“You gonna run, Gia?” His voice is like a caress, but I know better. We’re just getting warmed up, and this hasn’t even started to get ugly. I turn and look around for my clothes.
“Yeah, I’m going to save us both and get out now.” I turn but he grabs me, bringing me to his chest.
“Careful, Gia.” He shakes me. “Do you really think that’s how this works?” His hand tightens on my arm. “Do you?”
“I don’t know how any of this works. All I know is that—”
“Exactly. We can’t know our future. We only have now. This second. Goddammit, Gia, I choose this moment to be with you.”
“You scare me.”
“That’s probably the most honest thing you’ve said to me.” He holds me close, the robe falling to the floor. “Tell me what you want, baby.”
My head is spinning as I try to breathe. My eyes feel like someone tossed sand in them and my skin is on fire. When my head falls back, his mouth hovers at my lips.
“I want…” It sounds like a growl, but I’ve lost all sense of anything as he kisses my eyes and licks my tears.
“Talk to me,” he coaxes.
“I want… you,” I whisper as hot tears spill down my face.
“You got me.” Our eyes lock, and in this moment I believe him.
I believe him.
He cups my face, his thumb wiping away my tears as his mouth dips to mine. His kiss holds everything I could ever want.
“My heart beats for you,” he whispers, lifting me up. I wrap my legs around his waist. For now, this seems like it’s enough. I close my eyes. I’ll let him make me forget. As soon as his body connects with mine, he’ll take away my pain, my doubts. So I close my eyes and let his mouth take away the pain.
RHYS
Present – Thirty-five years old
London, England
As we enter the O2 Arena, I squeeze her hand. It’s fucking raining again. I’m so fucking sick of rain.
“We’re going to the south of Spain after the documentary,” I grumble.
“Let’s just go to Hawaii.” Gia sighs as she looks around at the multitude of fans rushing toward us. Ace and his crew instantly shield us as we walk in and make our way to the green room.
We haven’t been out of the suite in two days. I’ve fucked us raw emotionally and physically. But now that we’re out, it’s business as usual and by that, I mean, anything goes.
Gia must sense it too. Her beautiful green eyes are back to being cautious, almost resigned to the fact that something’s going to happen. Good or bad, this is our life. We’ll power through it.
“You look beautiful,” I tell her, stroking her hand with my thumb. Her hair is down, her green eyes pop since she did that smokey thing, and her fucking lips… like ripe berries. If I were anywhere else than here, I’d suck on them, throw her up against the wall, and lose myself in her.