Reckless (Mockingbird Square 4)
Page 32
“Aren’t you?”
He looked at her and away again and then he sighed. “Contemplation,” he said, and went quietly from the room. Margaret heard the front door close behind him.
She and her mother were finally alone.
Margaret reached to take her hand and her mother squeezed her fingers. She seemed to be struggling with some internal battle. “Margaret,” she said, “I want to say something before I go.”
“Go?” Margaret was alarmed. “Go where?”
“I don’t mean physically. I know my mind is dimming. Rather like fog rolling in over the fields around Denwick. I can still see clearly enough to say what I must say, but very soon I will have forgotten. Please pay attention.”
“Oh Mother …”
“I want to tell you that you have your life ahead of you. I know you are a good girl, and you want to do what is right. You were brought up to believe in sacrifice, but I think it was always there in your nature. But I do not want you to sacrifice yourself for me, Margaret. Your happiness is far more important to me than having you by my side, not when most of the time I do not even know who you are.”
Margaret began to protest, but her mother spoke over her.
“I want you to explain to Lily when she comes. She is keen to help. I will go with her to Portobello, and I will be perfectly happy there, I assure you.”
“I will be happy too, staying here with you, and marrying Louis. I am useful here, Mother.”
“You are miserable. Don’t you think I can see it, during those times I am still able to see anything? You should agree to whatever your earl has asked of you, Margaret. He came here for you—”
“He didn’t! His great uncle—”
Her mother waved a hand dismissively. “He came here for you, Margaret. Let him make you happy. I know he wants to. Let yourself be happy.”
Margaret tried to gather together her arguments, because she knew it couldn’t be that easy. The earl was married already and if she agreed to what he wanted she would be living in sin. Not to mention creating a dreadful scandal.
Before she could explain her mother squeezed her hand again. “Even if you stay, I will lose you, Margaret.”
“No! I don’t want to lose you, Mother.” Margaret fought back tears.
“And yet … when my mind slips away, I truly believe I still carry you with me, somewhere deep inside. Always.”
They sat in poignant silence, until Margaret sighed. “Mother, I must tell you,” she began, but her words trailed away to a stop. Her mother looked vague, distant, and the sparkle had gone from her eyes. The fog had closed over her mind again.
12
“You’re up to something, Nic.”
The earl and his sister were strolling back to the White Boar. The air was icy but Dominic found it invigorating. He was about to make the biggest decision of his life and he still wasn’t certain if he was doing the right thing. Although Dominic had never been a man who doubted himself—at least not until he met Margaret—this wasn’t just his life he was tampering with. Yes, he had dabbled in the lives of others before, but never to such an extent as this.
“I’m sorry I brought you all the way up here, Sib.”
She gave him a curious look. “Why are you sorry? I’m not. I’ve had a marvellous time. It’s been like the old days for me. I know you have been trying to rehabilitate my reputation, but I fear I am a lost cause.”
He smiled down at her. “I’m not sure I would describe our stay as ‘marvellous’.”
“Not even with Margaret giving you those love struck looks over the luncheon table? And, I might add, you returning them.”
“On that note,” Dominic said sardonically, “was your giddy behaviour all pretend just now? That poor man is completely infatuated with you.”
“Louis really is very sweet,” Sibylla said with a sigh, not pretending she didn’t know who he was talking about. “Although I don’t think he and Margaret are at all suited for marriage. They are both far too willing to give up their own happiness for the sake of others. Budding saints, the pair of them. They’d probably begin to resent each other soon after the knot was tied.”
“Is that so?” He watched her in amused surprise. “Is that why you made the poor man fall in love with you just now?”
“I didn’t make him do anything! If I am being honest, it began as me trying to help you, Nic. I thought I could distract Louis so that you could concentrate on Margaret.”