Again, in the upper reaches of the house, Vivianna could hear the tinkle of a piano and a woman singing. Did Aphrodite’s protégées live here? Were they just biding their time until the men who enjoyed their favors provided them with cozy establishments of their own? It seemed an idle sort of existence, and not one that she envied them.
Dobson opened the door to the room with the pastoral tapestry, and Aphrodite rose with a rustle of black silk skirts. Her face was a little thinner and paler, her dark eyes a little larger, but otherwise she was unchanged.
Or was she?
Vivianna thought she sensed a new tension in the courtesan that she had not been aware of before, as if she were holding her feelings even more in check. But a moment later Aphrodite had taken her hand with her usual aloof and beautiful smile and asked her to be seated. Perhaps she had been imagining the difference, thought Vivianna. Besides, her mind was just too full of Oliver to concentrate much on anything else.
Last night she had dreamed about him. Her body had arched beneath his hands and his mouth had kissed and sucked upon hers, while his fingers brought her again to pleasure. It had swept through her, throbbing heated waves that made her moan aloud, and pulled her out of her sleep. As she lay in her bed, the ripples receding, a warm glow suffusing her, she could not pretend it hadn’t happened. Even in her dreams Oliver made love to her,
and she responded.
“I want to thank you for introducing me to Elena, and for your advice, Madame,” Vivianna said, trying to keep the hint of desperation from her voice.
Aphrodite was watching her from a chair, and at the same time fiddling with a jet bracelet. Rings flashed on her fingers and her slender neck should have been bowed down with the weight of her precious necklaces. If her jewelry was any indication, then Aphrodite was indeed a fabulously wealthy woman.
“So I did help?”
Vivianna prayed Aphrodite could not read minds. “Yes, thank you, you did.”
“Does Lord Montegomery still see you as the respectable Miss Greentree?”
Vivianna hesitated. “I—I’m not sure. I do not think he ever believed me to be entirely respectable. But then, he is not respectable, is he?”
A frown marred Aphrodite’s brow. “Oliver does not need to be as careful of his reputation as you do, Vivianna.”
“Because he is a gentleman,” Vivianna said darkly.
Aphrodite smiled. “Yes, there is that. However, it is my experience that when an English gentleman looks at a woman, he sees her in either of two ways. Either she is respectable or she is corrupted. The former he will place upon a pedestal and marry; the latter he will not.”
“I do not wish to marry him!”
“Perhaps not, but you may wish to marry a gentleman someday. It would be a pity if your reputation was ruined and the choice taken from you.”
Vivianna shifted impatiently. “I have told you before, I do not care what society thinks of me. The shelter is my main concern, and what I can do to save Candlewood. Why are you worrying about my reputation, Madame? Surely that is my concern?”
Aphrodite’s dark eyes were so compelling, it really was as if she were reading Vivianna’s mind. “The life of a courtesan is an honorable one, mon chou. She may share herself with many men, but she gives much in return. I have been the companion of many men, some of them I have been very fond of indeed, but only one have I loved. When I was young, I was very poor. I saw this life as my way out of poverty, and I took it, but in doing so I forsook love. Now that I am older I want that love again. I understand that it is love that is the most important element of all in our lives.”
“Why are you—”
“I am telling you that you must not burn your bridges, Vivianna. I do not want to see you forced into a life you will end up regretting, because of one selfish man’s desire.”
Aphrodite was worried for her. Perhaps she sensed that there was more to Vivianna’s feelings for Oliver than a business transaction. Vivianna felt her heart soften. She leaned forward and held out her hand. After a moment, Aphrodite reached out her own cool fingers and clasped Vivianna’s.
“You are very generous and very kind,” Vivianna said firmly. “Thank you for your care of me. But I will manage very well, you will see. I cannot deny that I…I am curious in these matters. I have enjoyed Oliver’s attentions—they are new and pleasurable—but I am fully aware of what I am doing. He is not coercing me in any way, I promise you. What I do, I do willingly.”
Aphrodite squeezed her fingers. “That is what worries me, mon chou! Tell me, do you think Oliver is a man who will marry for love, or will he marry for duty, while enjoying himself elsewhere?”
Vivianna already knew the answer to that question. “Duty, but that has nothing to do—”
“Then that is how you must look upon this situation. You are doing your duty, you are trying to save your shelter. You must not love him, or believe he loves you. If you do, he will hurt you.”
It was clear Aphrodite was speaking from a vast experience, and Vivianna could not dismiss her words. But instead she found her thoughts straying to the trembling of her body and the ache he made wherever he touched her; his hot blind kisses, as if he were as much enthrall as she, and the way in which he had looked at her afterward.
Surely if Vivianna was drowning in him, then Oliver was also lost at sea?
Aphrodite was watching her, and there was sadness in the line of her mouth. She shook her head impatiently. “You do not listen to me!” she declared.
“I do, really I do. But I am not the sort of girl who can stand back. My feelings are too close to the surface, and when I feel, I feel with every part of me. I can never play the part of indifference.”