He didn’t accumulate much, but the closet was full of high school football trophies. I pulled a stack of yearbooks from the top shelf. I dusted them off and put them on the bed.
There was a box on the floor, under his winter coats. I opened the top flap. It was full of Ranger school manuals. I sat on the floor, looking through everything my brother had saved.
What if Elliot hadn’t joined the Army? I looked at the pictures of him in his uniform. He was a handsome guy, but I never would have told him that. It would have gone straight to my older brother’s head.
I wiped away a tear.
“Olivia?” I heard Jake’s voice outside the door. He stepped into the room. “There you are. I’m back from the store.”
He stopped. His eyes landed on the pictures in my lap, the tears streaming down my face.
“What happened? What’s wrong?” His chest puffed forward and his eyes immediately darted to the window. He scanned the room.
I shook her head. “I’m fine. I thought I’d pack up Elliot’s things, but maybe I shouldn’t. It’s too soon, but I’ve got to clean this stuff out of here.”
“Oh.” He lowered his voice. He took a step toward me, crouching to the floor so we were eye level.
My breath caught in my chest when he reached for my face and brushed the tears from my cheeks.
“What did you find?” he asked.
It was tender and sweet. His skin was warm.
“Maybe you can help me.” I couldn’t take my eyes off him. The world had felt dark and sad, and then he walked into the room. His wide shoulders making me feel protected. His eyes full of concern. His touch gentle.
“Sure. What do you have?” He sat next to me.
I shoved the manuals in his lap. “Do I need to save these?”
He looked down at the manuals and chuckled. “He kept these?” He flipped open the first one.
“Are they important?” I asked.
“Not really. It’s just basic intro school stuff. It’s not like there are any classified secrets in here.” He seemed to enjoy looking through the manual. “Man, I forgot our instructor’s name.”
“Were you in this class with Elliot?”
“Yeah. It was our first class together. Who knew we’d end up in the same squad?”
“Was anyone else from that class on your team?”
“No. Half of them didn’t make it through the training. Then after that one, there was another Special Forces school. The graduation rate isn’t very high.” He eyed me and I felt the heat rise in her cheeks.
“Elliot didn’t tell me much.”
“I’m sure he wanted to. We can’t share much about we do.” His voice was thick and husky and sitting this close to him, I felt my skin tingle.
I picked up a stack of pictures from the box. “Do you know who any of these guys are?”
Jake shuffled through them, pausing every once and awhile. “Yeah, I knew a few of these guys.” He handed them back to me.
“Do you want them?” I offered. “I don’t know who they are. You can keep them if you like.”
“No. It’s better if I don’t get attached to things. I travel lightly. Everything I have fits in the back of my Jeep.”
My forehead creased. “Well, that’s kind of a sad way to live. You don’t keep pictures? Or what about books? Family mementos? You must have at least one Christmas ornament.”
He shook his head. “Tools and clothes. That’s it. I can’t afford to put down more roots than that right now.”