Sweet Satisfaction

Helena gleamed at me. “See? He’s fine .”

I nodded with a smile. “He is .”

My shoulders relaxed. The jitters eased. My fears weren’t Luke’s. He didn’t look terrified. Nothing around him fazed him. He ruled that field .

“Are we having wine at this party or what ?”

“Oh sorry.” There was a time out on the field for a referee review. “What would you like ?”

“Whatever you’re drinking .”

I stopped. Was I drinking? It was absurd not to. I’d already decided the chance of me being pregnant was only my runaway tendency to worry taking over. But there was that thought in the back of my head. What if I was? What if I was carrying Luke’s baby and getting ready to douse it in wine ?

“I’ll find something,” I offered .

I had filled Helena in on what happened with Luke—everything except the broken condom. It was the one piece of the story I had deliberately left out .

I looked through my liquor cabinet to see what I could concoct. I pulled out the cranberry juice, vodka, and spritzer. In one glass I added vodka. In the other I doused an extra splash of the spritzer. There. She’d never know I wasn’t drinking .

I returned just as the game came back from commercial .

“Here you go.” I handed her the tall Cosmo .

“Oh, yummy.” She took a sip. “Delish .”

“Good.” I wiggled back onto my spot on the couch .

The Warriors won the dispute and Luke had the ball again. His eyes were narrowed in concentration .

I’d never felt such a rush before watching football. I think it made me miss him more .

There was a deep pang in my chest and an ache in my core. I curled into a ball. I was glad Helena was here, but I wanted Luke. I wished I could be there with him after the game .

“So, we haven’t even talked about tomorrow .”

“What do you mean?” I was trying to focus on the next play .

“The Country Year Awards are going to be announced and you aren’t even batting an eyelash about them .”

Someone crossed over the line and grabbed a fistful of Luke’s jersey. I jerked to the edge of the couch. He had thrown the ball before the defender got to him. He was fine. Yelling enough curse words to fill a sailor’s bible, but fine .

I turned to her. “I’m not hung up on that stuff. You know that .”

“Yeah, but Jake is .”

“Can we not talk about him ?”

I didn’t want my good mood to sour .

“Sorry.”

“It’s ok. He and I aren’t on the best of terms right now and it’s going to be a long time before he forgives me for spending an extra day in Austin. All he can talk about is how my image has taken a hit from being seen with Luke. I’m tired of hearing about it .”

“And you can’t tell him that?” Helena always wanted me to stand up to Jake, but she didn’t know the full story .

“No.” I lowered my eyes and voice together. “It’s complicated with Jake .”

“Oh look, they’re going for it.” Helena’s eyes darted to the TV .