I heard him break the seal on a beer. “Need one of these?”
I grinned. “Hell yeah I do.”
I threw the sand paper down and took one of the beers. “Thanks.”
“So, you opened the barn back up. Does that mean anything?” he asked, taking a seat on one of the empty sawhorses. His feet shuffled over wood shavings that littered the barn floor.
“No.” I chugged. “Means I needed to sand this juniper.”
“Right. Right. So it has nothing to do with a certain blonde who is leaving the island?”
My eyes shot to his. “What are you talking about?”
“I ran into Shirley when I bought the beer. She said Sierra has to head back to Texas in a couple of days. Something about work. You didn’t know?”
“Huh. No, I hadn’t heard. Good for her.”
“Man, really?”
“What the fuck do you want me to do? She doesn’t want to stay. Some people leave and come back. Some don’t.”
“And you’re giving up on her? She came back, man. She’s trying to do the right thing.”
I tipped the cold bottle to my lips. “The right thing? She was forced to come back here. Don’t cut her any slack. She’s here because she has to be.”
Cole shook his head. “I knew her in high school too. Don’t forget that.”
“And you were here when she left.”
“I was. But she was a kid. We all were. You seriously going to hold a grudge like that?”
“No. I don’t give a shit what she does.”
“You’re not going to call her?” Cole grilled me. “Because that’s what this is all about. The sanding, opening the barn, the pissy mood—it’s Sierra.”
I shook my head. “Nah, it was a mistake. I shouldn’t have taken her out to the Dock House or the Cape. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking opening up that shit back up with her.”
I kept my head down and focused on smoothing out each bump in the plank’s grain. Sanding was good. It kept me from thinking. But Cole was pushing hard to make me face things about Sierra I didn’t want to admit.
“Ok, ok. I’m just trying to help you out. Seems like you’re making a mistake from where I stand.”
“Stay out of it, Cole. It’s complicated.” I groaned.
Cole threw his hands in the air and took a step backward. “I’m out. You do what you’re going do.”
“Thanks. I think I can handle Sierra.”
He turned before he walked out of the doors. “For the record, it’s good to see the lights on in here again.”
I did my best impression of a smile. “Thanks, man.”
“You bet.”
I wiped my forehead with the back of my wrist and tossed the sandpaper in the open trash can. I had already gone through two sheets on just a few boards. They were rubbed raw. And underneath it all I felt the same way. Raw. Open. Staring pain and grief in the face under the dark cloak of uncertainty.
Sierra. Fuck. What was I going to do about that girl? The vein along the side of my neck pulsed with anger. Why should I be surprised she was running so soon? Wasn’t that what she did? She’d left at the most painful time in my life. Right as my parents sat me down and told me my mother had only months to live.
And where was the girl who loved me? The one who had my back? The one who pushed me toward my dreams? She had vanished like foam on the beach. Washed out like a cold wave on a December beach.