“No, Em.”
I felt the disappointment sink in. I didn’t want him to leave. I didn’t know how to stall him without coming across as immature. I should be able to handle this. It was a business trip. When he went to Germany for a week things weren’t this serious between us. We had one date. We were way past that point now.
The last months had been everything I wanted in a relationship. Knowing there was going to be an interruption in that made me nervous. It shouldn’t. I should have more confidence in him. In us.
I pulled my shoulders back.
“I hope you have fun wherever you go.” I plastered on a fake smile.
“Thanks.” He leaned down to kiss me. “Bye, Emily.”
He backed up toward the door, pausing for a second. I thought he was going to say something, but he turned and was gone.
I fell on the bed, trying not to feel sad. He would be back soon, I told myself. And between now and then I had plenty to keep me busy. I had more than most people. I had a huge wrongful termination case. I had a meeting with Max Harrison this week. I had a roommate to reconnect with.
I pulled the pillow to my chest. I had all of that, but what I really wanted had just walk
ed out the door.
18
I had fallen into sort of a groove at work. It was still chaotic and overwhelming, but that had become my new normal. Monday morning, I walked in looking for a case to distract me. I wanted to sink my teeth into something while Vaughn was gone. I hadn’t heard from him yet.
Addie looked up for a brief second.
“Good morning.” I smiled.
“Hi.” She scribbled notes on an open file.
Jessie was right behind me. “Am I late?” She was noticeably out of breath.
“No.” I shook my head. “I just got here.”
“Good.” She scooted in next to me, closer than what I was comfortable with. “I was worried that you had already started meeting with clients. I ran from the shuttle, but then I remember I left my phone so I had to find that and it was one thing after another.”
I didn’t know if I was a good mentor for Jessie or not. I didn’t enforce any type of rule system. I taught her the law of the cases we worked on. I explained what documents we needed and the deadlines for filing them. I didn’t give her advice on how to make a career in law or even how to impress the boss by showing up on time.
Addie was the complete opposite. She had handed her mentees a syllabus with expectations and guidelines for the year. They checked in with her throughout the day.
“Want me to go on a coffee run?” Jessie offered.
“Actually yes.” I needed a second to breathe. Alone. I handed her a wad of cash. “The usual.”
“No problem.” She stuffed the bills into her purse and walked out of the office.
It gave me a few minutes to settle in.
Meg poked her head in the door. “Ready?”
I waved her off, while Addie waved her first client in for the morning.
I needed more time. I didn’t know if there was enough coffee or enough minutes. But I wasn’t ready.
By lunch Jessie and I had seen four new clients and two active cases. I wanted to devote the rest of the afternoon to cases I still had pending.
It was hard to juggle the caseload with so many people piling up in the lobby. I didn’t want to turn anyone away, but I couldn’t help the people I was already committed to if I didn’t close some of the cases.
I walked to the student store to grab a salad. I pulled my phone out when it buzzed. It was a text from Greer.