Resist

I looked at him. One tear fell before another. “Is this what you needed to see? My tears. How you have drained me of every emotion. You have destroyed me. Did you need proof? Does this do something for you? Did you want to see the wreckage you left behind?”

“Damn it, Ell. No. No.”

His lips crushed mine with force and fury. I squirmed against him, but he held me against his body. The hard kiss blistered my lips. He breathed desperately and I reacted with instinct. With the memory of his scent, his touch. My hands clasped around his neck as his tongue twined against mine. His mouth moved with urgent strokes, sucking at the corners of my lips, biting until I moaned. The tears slid toward my chin. I gulped for air. I clung to him. I was starved for him. For his body. There was a thirst I craved that the wine hadn’t touched. There was a need for him that work couldn’t erase. There was a hollow hole that couldn’t be filled no matter how many miles I ran. None of it could do for me what that one kiss had. What one dangerous intoxicating kiss could restore.

“I love you. I came back because I love you,” he whispered.

I staggered backward, trying to catch my breath. Trying to break away from the kiss that was more dangerous than a gun. I shouldn’t have given in like that. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, but my skin was already seared with his mark.

“What are you trying to do?” I stared at him. “You’ve played every angle you can with me. Just stop. The game is over.”

“What? There is no angle. I came back for you.”

My hands raked through my hair as I sank to the concrete. “I almost didn’t survive the first time you left. Is that what you need to hear? It wasn’t real for you, but it was real for me. I loved you when I shouldn’t have. I fell for you and that made it a lot easier for you to do your job. So I’m begging you.” I looked at him. The tears so heavy on my lids I could barely see. “If there is any humanity inside your soul, leave me. Because what happened can’t happen again. I can’t survive a second time.” I sniffed. “And I know how it sounds. It’s pathetic and stupid. But it’s the only way I’ll live. You have to know what you did to me.” My eyes lifted to his. “Get out.”

He dropped to his knees. He cupped my cheek with the palms of his hands.

“God, I’m sorry. I fucked up. It wasn’t supposed to happen. It never was supposed to happen like this.”

“And how was it supposed to happen? Did I not fall into the plan like I was supposed to? What exactly did I ruin for you, Vaughn?” I laughed bitterly. “And that’s not even your name. I can’t even use your real name.”

“It doesn’t matter what you call me. You can call me anything you want, Ell.”

“Please go,” I begged. “Please. I can’t do this. I can’t be a part of whatever phase this is in your deranged reality.”

“No.” He shook his head. “I can’t leave. I have to make it right. I have to fix this.”

“There is no fixing it. You’re wanted by the government. Turn yourself in.”

I didn’t expect the smirk. “That is also not going to happen.”

“You don’t have a choice. They’re going to catch you.” I sniffed.

“Sweetheart, I’ve been in this game a long time. I haven’t been caught yet.”

I felt it. The dangerous flicker that wicked the first night we met. The glimpse into the layers Vaughn carried. The draw that I tried to deny.

“What does that even mean?” I was mesmerized by him. By his audacity. By his presence. By the fact that he was here in the flesh, kissing me, touching me.

“I’m not turning myself in.”

He tipped my chin forward. My lips quivered.

“Let me go. Just let me go before there’s nothing of me left,” I begged.

“I’m not going to let go. I’m going to protect you. Take care of you. Save you when you need saving. Push you when you need it. Hold you. Kiss you. Get drunk on you.”

I stopped crying. “You want a second chance?”

“It’s not a second chance. I fucking love you, Elliot Charles. I never stopped. I left to spare you. And now I’m back for you.”

I fell into his arms. The kiss turned to liquid fire, engulfing us in raging flames. He pulled me from the floor, lifting me into his arms.

I stared into his eyes.

The sliding door closed behind us and he carried me to my room. He lowered me to the bed, then turned to close the door and pushed a chair under the handle.

“Just in case.” He winked.