Double Daddy Trouble

“Maybe you could just leave her with your friend, whats her name again?”

“Savannah.”

“Yeah, that one,” Mom affirmed.

Savannah was a born and raised California girl. She moved to Georgia when she was seventeen with her mother and new step-father. Though Savannah had stayed in the southern state, nothing could change her from her long hair, hippie, granola eating ways. This, of course, deemed her ‘that one’ in my mother’s eyes like she was more related to aliens then human beings.

“I wouldn’t feel comfortable leaving Em if she isn’t feeling well.”

You could just come for the party. It's only a two-hour drive. You could come up for the party and be home in time to put Emma to bed.”

“I’ll think about it,” I said not wanting to argue over the matter.

“Your sister only turns sixteen once,” she guilted, apparently not letting it drop.

“I know Mom.”

“I just hate that you are so far away. I wish you were closer, then maybe you and Alexa would be better friends.”

“It’s not like I am trying to avoid it because I don't want to be around my sister. My kid is sick. What do you expect me to do?”

“Hmmm,” she huffed in her that’s what I get for having a kid outside of wedlock kind of way.

I was seriously reconsidering my thoughts about moving back home. The one conversation had cured me of ever wanting to live near her again.

None the less, I figure it wouldn’t hurt just to put my feelers out.

“Hey Mom, I was kinda thinking about maybe moving back up that way actually?”

“You were?” She said just as surprised as I was that the words actually left my mouth.

“Yeah. I mean, you guys are Em’s only grandparents maybe she should be closer to you.”

“You know we aren’t her only ones,” Mom said pointedly.

She never liked the fact that I wouldn't come out and say who the father way. I am sure she guessed it was Hawk. After all, I was in a two-year relationship with him before he left.

She only asked once who the father was. That was when I first told her I was pregnant. All I said was that he wasn’t in the picture anymore, so it didn’t matter. We had never spoken of the other half of Emma’s gene pool again. That is until this moment.

Why on all days did Mom have to bring up Emma’s paternal connections today? My mind immediately turned back to Hawk sitting in his father's doctors office today.

I couldn’t help but feel my treacherous heart skip a beat at the image of him in my head. I couldn’t believe after all these years, and what he had done to me, my body would still react such a way at the thought of him.

“Forget it, Mom. Forget I said anything. I got to go make dinner for Em now. I’ll take to you later.”

I hung up the phone and got up out of the plain kitchen chair. Just the thought of Hawk made me light headed. I had to do something, keep myself busy, so my mind no longer could wander.

One thing was for sure; I could cross out moving back home from my list of escape routes. Maybe I would be lucky enough that Hawk wouldn’t give our encounters a second thought.

Evidently, he never thought I would stick around here, or that he might see me again. Maybe he was just as keen to avoid me as I was to avoid him. If that was the case, a simple change of doctors would do the trick, and we might never have to cross paths again.

I walked over to Emma. Realizing she had fallen asleep on the couch, I couldn’t help but relax my anxiety a little. Nothing was more soothing then seeing my own baby peaceful at rest.

I came to sit next to her as gently as possible and placed a hand on her forehead. She was still a little warm. Soon I would need to give her the next dose of fever reducer. I debated waking her up to do it our just waiting for her to wake up on her own.

I couldn’t help but play with her soft locks of black hair. Just like Hawk’s, it pained me to realize. There was so much of me in her it was easy to ignore the parts of him. But now that I had seen Hawk face to face again, all I could see in her angelic sleeping face was his visage lookin

g back at me.