He lifted my hips and thrust in. He was impossibly deeper, fuller, more than he had been a moment ago, and I cried out his name. He kept pushing into me, hands on my hips burning into my flesh, and hot, soft words falling from his lips with each sharp movement. I couldn’t stop the wave of my climax as it approached, fast and furious.
I grabbed at the pillows and bedsheets, trying to find some kind of anchor to help me survive what was coming, but nothing would help. Joshua had taken ownership of my body in that moment. I had to accept that.
I called out, and with a final thrust, felt the force of his climax crashing over both of us, cascading through me into every atom of every cell of my body.
He collapsed over me and pulled me to him as we both fought for breath.
Seconds, minutes, hours seemed to pass.
“What was that?” he whispered in my ear.
My ears rang like I’d been to a twenty-four-hour-long rock concert. I’d lost the ability to move my limbs. I wasn’t sure I could even speak any longer, so I just shook my head. Whatever it was, I wanted to hold onto it for as long as possible.
Twenty-Nine
Hartford
Was it weird to watch someone sleep?
I’d woken up about ten minutes ago. We hadn’t shut the curtains last night and somehow Joshua was managing to sleep despite the sunshine spilling through the huge windows. That or he knew I was sitting here watching him, and he was indulging my weirdness by pretending to sleep. I wouldn’t put it past him.
I wanted to stay here until he woke and talk all day and do everything naked, but I had to leave for my shift in thirty minutes.
I checked my phone. Correction: twenty minutes. Shit. I pulled on my dress and looked around for a piece of paper and a pen to leave a note, but there was nothing. I opened the bedroom door, being careful not to make a noise, and saw a bunch of papers on the dining table and a printer that had overflowed whatever it was printing onto the floor. I’d steal some paper for a note without disturbing what I was sure was organized chaos.
I crouched to gather up the fallen papers and an image caught my eye. I turned it the right way up.
Calmation.
I read it again to make sure I’d not imagined something.
No, I hadn’t. It definitely said “Calmation.” Heat crawled up my body and I tried to think.
Why would Joshua have papers relating to the very ADHD drug Gerry and I were set to campaign against? My heart began to thunder in my chest as I turned over more of the fallen papers to try to see what was going on. I stood and placed each page on the table. Image after image of packaging with different logos. Some of the packages were regular cardboard pill packets. Others tubs of vitamins. One even looked like a packet of gummy bears.
Every few images there were a couple of pages of writing, which I skimmed in a kind of haze. I read the final page with more intent, my brain stumbling back from the shock that had sent me reeling. I dropped the paper like it was on fire.
It settled at my feet, right side up. I tried to ignore the nausea that growled in my gut.
Luca Brands presents Calmation for Merdon.
I covered my mouth with my hands to stop myself from screaming. There was no way Joshua would do this. He was the king of luxury goods. Why would he work with them?
I clawed at my throat as I tried to take a deep breath, but all I could pull into my lungs was heat and panic.
I tried to piece together the memories of our conversations. He told me he was working with a pharma company that was helping people. He said he was inspired by me to do good. Could he really believe that, or was he just doing the bidding of whoever would pay him?
Yesterday I had told him I was campaigning against a new ADHD drug with Gerry. With all the insider information he had, he must have put two and two together and realized I was talking about Calmation.
I sank to the floor and tried to think what I should do.
I could wake him and demand that he tell me why he didn’t say anything yesterday. I could try to insist that he drop his campaign to help Calmation and join me in the fight against them. And if he refused? I’d have to try to stop him and Merdon. Before I could think twice, I was out of his flat and focused on getting to work.
I had to stop Merdon.
I had to stop Joshua.