The corner of his lips twitched with humor. “I can’t help it. I like order.”
“Nothing wrong with that. Are you going to want to take a shower?”
“Well, if you don’t mind…yes, please.”
“I’ll grab you a clean towel.” I headed for the door.
“Blake?”
“Yeah?”
“I’ll help you.” He wiggled his nose before continuing. “I’m not sure how exactly, but I’ll try.”
I nodded graciously. “Thanks, I appreciate—”
“But this…sexy business”—Asher gestured between us—“can’t happen again.”
I moved back into the room and set my hand on his shoulder, caressing the column of his throat with my thumb. “I think we both know it’s going to happen again. You turn me on.”
“I don’t mean to,” he protested weakly.
“But you do. And now that I know that lightsabers give you wood and that you dig the idea of me taking you over my knee and spanking your sweet ass…” I kissed his neck and nibbled his earlobe. “I feel like I might know how to reciprocate.”
“Mmm.” He closed his eyes for a brief second, then slapped my hand and spun toward the bathroom. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. I can resist temptation.”
Yeah, but I couldn’t. At all.
“Challenge accepted.” I moved past him and pulled a fresh towel from the linen closet. “I’ll give you my number and leave this up to you. You’re in control, Asher. I’ll respect your wishes either way.”
“Thank you.” He inclined his chin regally and closed the bathroom door behind him.
I scratched my head in bemusement. Had I really insinuated that I could be in the same room as that guy and not want him? Impossible.
Somehow, I didn’t think extracurricular activity would be a problem with us. I’d proved over and over that I could keep my sex life separate from my everyday life. Regardless of his decision, that wouldn’t change now.
Sure, this was an unconventional idea, but if there was a way to make it mutually beneficial, we’d have nothing to lose.
But…it was up to him.
4
Asher
Today was a bad day.
It was also…really sexy and hot and fun. However, pleasure didn’t earn points, so I was forced to give myself a D. Again. In the fifteen years since I’d first implemented my personal achievement grading system, I’d never recorded a failing grade twice within a ten-day period. Apparently, I was on the road to ruin.
The galling part was that I knew I was going easy on myself. I deserved an F.
I didn’t like that letter, though. It was displeasing to write and harsh to the ear. The only exception was the word “fuck.” I liked that word…a lot. I liked that it sounded dirty and base, like the act itself. And yes, I loved everything about fucking. But I was less crazy that I’d engaged in sexual activity of the penetrative sort with Blake—not once, but twice.
The first time was pure coincidence. The second… Oh, my God.
I could not justify my actions. Moral Me judged harshly and found absolutely nothing redeemable about having sex with someone who’d hurt my friend, regardless of the circumstance. I was doomed to daily Ds and Fs unless I did something to counteract my awfulness. And that was why I agreed to help Blake.
The timing was terrible. It was the beginning of May now, which meant I had just six weeks till graduation. The sheer amount of academic work required was daunting enough. Add an internship and there simply weren’t enough hours in the day. I’d have to rearrange my schedule—perhaps cut off puzzle time and television viewing for the remainder of the month.
I tapped my pen against my chin and stared, unseeing, at the color-coded calendar on my desk.
Maybe I could make this into a one-day consultation rather than a full project. I really had no idea. I never came out. It wasn’t necessary. My mother told me I was gay when I was ten…well before I knew what the label meant. Her forthright mannerisms were surprisingly delicate, but—she was a professional. I wasn’t.
I should ask her. No…I shouldn’t. She’d have questions and—
Knock. Knock.
I glanced up with a start when Tommy peeked into my bedroom.
“Hi.”
Tommy leaned against the doorjamb and hooked his thumb behind him. “Holden and I were going to grab something at Lucky’s after he gets off the phone with his mom. Are you hungry?”
“Actually, yes. Are Topher and George here?” I asked, pushing away from my desk.
“No, Topher is with Simon. He mentioned something about a meeting with the contractor at their new house. And George is with his not-so-mysterious mystery man.” Tommy snorted in amusement. “Does he really think we don’t know that he’s having sexual relations with his mechanic?”
I shrugged. It was a fair question, but I felt protective of George’s dalliance with Aiden. And partially responsible too. I was the one who’d encouraged him to get out of his head…and maybe even view an affair with a closeted bi man as an experiment for our Script Club project.