Pretenders (Firsts and Forever 3)

He’d made our photo the background on his start screen. “Perfect,” I said. “Very convincing.”

He shot me a quick text, then said, “I just sent you my contact information and a link to the trip’s itinerary. Also, I’ll buy you a plane ticket today. I was planning to fly out on Saturday morning, if that works for you.”

“That’s perfect.”

He looked around and said, “That’s about it for the office tour. Want to head out?”

I nodded and followed him, and he turned off lights and shut doors as we retraced our steps. When we reached the reception desk, I pocketed one of his business cards. Then I eyed the basket of stickers that were obviously meant for his little patients and asked, “May I have two of those, please?”

“Help yourself.” I slapped a unicorn sticker onto my shirt pocket, then selected a little rainbow and stuck it to his lapel. “You’re a very unique individual, Ash.” He looked amused.

“Thanks for the compliment.”

When we were back downstairs in the open-air mall level, I posed him in front of a blooming planter and snapped a photo. Then I made it my start screen and showed it to him. “There we go. I wanted it to have a different background than the photo on your phone, in case your family sees both.”

“Once again, excellent attention to detail.” We both stood there for a few moments, unsure of what to do next. Finally, he said, “Well, I should let you go. Thank you for meeting me, and everything else.”

“Will you come to my apartment for dinner tomorrow?”

“I’d love to.”

“Great. The address is in your phone, and I’ll see you at six.”

He nodded, and both of us paused again, as if expecting the other to say something. Then he offered me a self-conscious smile before turning and walking away. When he reached the corner, he looked back, and I gave him a little wave before he disappeared from sight.

As I headed in the opposite direction, I called Jasper. He answered on the second ring with, “How’d it go?”

“He’s incredible, Jas.”

“Does that mean you’re going to Bora Bora with him?”

“Oh yeah, no question. I decided that within a minute of meeting him. And tomorrow night, he’s coming to our apartment for dinner.”

He asked, “Are you sure that’s a good idea? I never bring clients home, for a lot of reasons.”

I’d almost forgotten about the “client” part. “I trust him,” I said. “And if we’re going to convince his family we’re a couple, we need a crash course in each other’s lives over the next few days. I told him it would be a better approach than trying to memorize a bunch of random facts about each other.”

“Okay, but just be careful, Ash.”

“No worries. Like I said, I trust him.”

“I mean, be careful not to get too attached to this guy,” Jasper said. “Remember, this is just a business arrangement. When it’s over, you’re going back to your life, he’s going back to his, and you’ll probably never see him again.”

I tried to sound confident as I told my friend, “Don’t worry. I know what I’m doing.”

Did I, though?

Chapter 3

The following afternoon, I went to visit my friend Cole, because I wanted to tell him about my upcoming trip and the whole paid escort situation. There were some things weighing on my mind, and Cole had a way of cutting right to the heart of the matter.

He and his husband River lived in a tiny house in the backyard of a grand Victorian, which was in one of San Francisco’s richest neighborhoods. The mansion belonged to a colorful little old lady named Nana Dombruso. Apparently back in the day, her family had made their money in the mob. That was the story, anyway.

Nana had several gay grandkids and great-grandkids, which was how she’d found her true calling—as the biggest LGBTQ ally in the history of LGBTQ allies. Her house was painted top to bottom in a shimmering rainbow, and a huge gay pride flag waved majestically from a tall flagpole in the front yard.

Seated in folding chairs beneath the flag on this particular day were Nana, Cole, River, and a cute young guy named Darwin, who was engaged to Nana’s great-grandson Josh. They were all sipping tropical cocktails, and they definitely looked like they were waiting for something—especially Nana, who inexplicably was dressed in a camouflage velour track suit, mirrored aviator glasses, and a plastic army helmet that looked like it had come from the party store.

“Hi, y’all,” I said, as I came to a stop on the sidewalk. “What’re you doing?”

“We’re waiting on a special delivery for my neighbor Humpington,” Nana said. “Pull up a chair and enjoy the show, sweetie.”

I was pretty sure the neighbor’s name was actually Huntington, and I’d heard many stories of their ongoing feud. It seemed the man in the house across the street was more than a little transphobic and homophobic, which was enough to instantly land him on Nana’s shit list. Some of his other offenses included calling the police on her frequent parties, trying for years to get the city to force her to paint over the rainbow on her house, and repeatedly stealing her pride flag. Nana’s ways of getting revenge for these heinous acts were varied, colorful, and always inspired. I couldn’t wait to see what was up her sleeve this time.