I released him and shoved away from him so I could go search out some paper towels to clean up the mess on the floor.
“And why don’t you stop acting so high and mighty? Like you’re so much fucking better than everyone else?”
I turned to see Dante use his hands to push his hair off his face and then his gaze held mine in a direct challenge.
But it was what I didn’t see that had me hesitating from lashing back at him the way I was tempted to. His words said he was pissed, but his eyes…they told a whole other story.
“You mean you, don’t you?” I asked softly.
“What?” he asked, though I knew he knew what I was talking about.
“You mean, why don’t I stop acting like I’m better than you? Right?”
“No! No, that’s not…”
My heart hurt for Dante as I watched his face fall. I closed the distance between us again so I could stop him if he tried to escape the room before we could finally hash this out, but I didn’t touch him.
“Tell me what I did to make you think that,” I insisted.
Dante dropped his eyes, a move I now knew he only did when he was struggling with his vulnerability. “Nothing…I should…I should go keep watch.”
He made a move to leave, but I planted my hand on the wall next to his shoulder, essentially caging him in. “Dante,” I said softly and this time I did brush his hair back, ignoring the message it was sending. “Please tell me what I did to make you think that.”
Dante lifted his head and let the back of his head thump against the wall as he stared at me. But he didn’t say anything and I could tell by his eyes that he was trying to mentally retreat from the whole conversation. Any second now, he’d blurt out some crude remark to prove to me he wasn’t affected by whatever wrong I’d unintentionally inflicted upon him.
Fuck, I really didn’t want that.
“Is it because I ignore you when you take your jabs at me?”
I saw a spark in his gaze and he finally shook his head. “I know why you do that,” was all he said.
“Then what?” I asked, hating the unspoken plea that fell from my lips. I shouldn’t give a shit about all this, but I did. It was one thing to use my silence as a defense against his snarky attitude, but I’d clearly done something that had left a mark.
“You dismissed me,” he whispered. “They dismissed me.”
At a loss, I shook my head, but before I could even ask who he was talking about, he said, “You walked into that room and I was nothing.”
I still had no idea what he was talking about, but as I wracked my brain to try and figure it out, I remembered what he’d said to me just a few moments earlier.
You may think I’m a joke, but I’m damn good at my job.
Understanding dawned and I murmured, “Ronan and Memphis.”
They were clearly the “they” Dante was referring to and I knew he was talking about the day I’d been summoned to Ronan’s office to be told I was getting a bodyguard. I’d still been reeling from all the emotions that had gone through me when I’d walked in on Dante with the guy in the bathroom and he’d been the last person I’d wanted to see in that moment. It hadn’t taken a genius to understand why I’d been called to that office, so my pride had taken a hit knowing Ronan, Memphis - and probably Hawke too - hadn’t thought me capable of taking care of myself. Add in that the one man they wanted to saddle me with also happened to be someone who’d managed to work his way under my skin like no other ever had, and I’d been in a less than reasonable mood.
And I sure as hell hadn’t wanted Dante to witness my humiliation as I’d been told I needed a keeper.
But considering the scenario from his perspective had shame flooding through me. He’d been dismissed from the room like he was some kid who wasn’t old enough to hear the grown-ups talk. And not just by me. No, my reaction had driven Ronan to ask Dante to step out and that had clearly bothered Dante more than either myself, Ronan or Memphis had even considered.
A sick feeling washed over me as I realized that Dante’s job meant so much more to him than I’d initially realized…it wasn’t just a job to him. It was who he was. Hell, it could be all he had…just like my work had been all I’d had after I’d lost Jenna and Matty.
“Dante-”
Dante tensed and then he was shoving past me. Before I could even try to stop him, he was heading for the front door. But I realized he wasn’t running away from me, because he was reaching for his gun even as he neared the door. “Someone’s coming,” was all he said and then he was out the door like a shot.