Atonement (The Protectors 6)

“Dante,” I began, but before I could get anything else out, Dante snatched up his packed bag and stalked towards me.

“Move,” he ordered since I was blocking the doorway.

“Dante, I didn’t mean what I said…”

“I don’t give a fuck!” he responded. “Get out of my way.”

“No, not until we talk.”

I wasn’t prepared for Dante to come at me. He dropped his bag and used both his hands to shove me backwards until I hit the wall behind me. The hallway was narrow and dark, but I didn’t need a lot of light to see the rage…and hurt in Dante’s eyes. I’d put both those things there.

“Fuck you, Magnus! I’m done!”

The man was like a wounded animal, but I knew if I left him alone, I’d likely never see him again. The idea was completely unacceptable to me. I’d lost my daughter in a moment of weakness. I wasn’t going to lose Dante the same way.

As he reached down to pick his bag up off the floor, I grabbed his wrist. He whirled on me and tried to hit me, but I was prepared for the attack and I caught his fist just before it would have collided with my jaw. His other hand came up to jab me in the ribs, but I sidestepped the blow and used my leg to sweep his out from under him, taking us both to the floor. I knew it was the only place I might have a chance of subduing him long enough that he’d listen to me. My intent had been to use my greater weight to my advantage, but Dante lashed out at me with everything he had and I nearly saw stars when I felt a blow glance off my jaw. The hallway was narrow enough so there wasn’t the room Dante needed to get a true advantage against me by putting me on my back. We struggled for several long, painful moments in which his fists connected with my body more than once. But I finally manage to lock my hands around his wrists and pin them above his head. I straddled his hips so he couldn’t buck up against me or reach me with his legs.

“Stop,” I ordered softly as he fought my hold. He was like a spitting cat as he threw everything he had at me and we were both breathing hard and sweating by the time he finally quieted beneath me.

“Get the fuck off me,” Dante said coldly, his voice deadly.

“Give me five minutes to say what I need to say,” I murmured. “Please, Dante.”

“No!”

I dropped my face until it was just inches from his. “Please,” I whispered against his ear. “Do this one last thing for me and I swear I won’t stop you if you still want to leave. I’ll call a cab for you myself.”

Dante remained mute which I decided to take as agreement.

“The day Jenna ran away, I’d been working for twenty-four hours straight. I was on my way home when I got a call from Matty’s babysitter that Jenna hadn’t shown up to pick him up the night before after she got off work – she’d been working as a bagger at the grocery store in town. I picked up Matty myself and took him home. I found Jenna getting high in her room with some guy she’d gone to high school with. I kicked him out and went to put Matty down for a nap. Jenna had started her fourth rehab program a week earlier. I was tired and frustrated and not thinking clearly and we started fighting about anything and everything. I was still pissed she’d stolen money from my wallet the day before and then she told me she’d lost her job. She said her boss had accused her of stealing but, of course, she said she hadn’t done it.” I paused as the adrenaline rush from the fight with Dante wore off and the guilt began to seep back into my body. Dante, for his part, was quiet, his expression blank. But he wasn’t fighting me, so I figured that was something.

“I told Jenna that if she didn’t get clean, I was going to kick her out and get custody of Matty. Losing Matty was one of her biggest fears because, despite everything, she loved him more than anything…but the drugs, they had a hold on her that not even the love she had for her son could compete with.”

I felt tears stinging my eyes as my words began to play on a loop in my head.

“What happened?” Dante asked, his voice soft…gentle.

God, the things this man did to me...

“She told me she didn’t believe me and she grabbed her purse and keys to leave. I told her that if she left, she shouldn’t come back. I told her I was done. She must have seen something in my face or heard something in my voice, because she got this look…like she didn’t know who I was. She told me to get out of her room so I went to mine to try and get some sleep and to figure out what to do next. She and Matty were both gone when I woke up.” I shook my head. “That last look she gave me…it’s haunted my dreams, Dante,” I admitted. “If I hadn’t said those things, maybe she-”