Forsaken (The Protectors 4)

“He’s in the living room,” Ronan said, his voice quiet and unreadable.

I turned away because I knew what it meant that the man hadn’t just gone and collected Eli like I’d asked. “It’s none of your business, Ronan,” I murmured as I woke my phone back up and started searching the flights again.

“Just like it’s none of his?” Ronan asked.

I didn’t respond to that and instead said, “I’ve got a lot of shit to do.”

Ronan stopped next to me and snatched my phone away and tossed it on the bed. “Seth is working on having the plane readied for you and as soon as you’re airborne, I’ll make the arrangements to have your mother’s body transported wherever you want.”

I knew Ronan was talking about the private jet he and Seth had recently purchased so they wouldn’t keep needing to charter a plane when they wanted to travel somewhere. Since Seth suffered from extreme anxiety, they’d found it more prudent to buy a private jet so that they could travel on their own schedule and bring Seth’s dog, Bullet, with them. And it wasn’t like the men couldn’t afford it.

“That’s not necessary,” I muttered as the numbness I’d felt ever since the man on the phone had muttered the words that had ensured I’d never hear my mother’s voice again. Even if it was just to beg for money.

“What happened with Eli?”

The shift in conversation caught me off guard and a wave of pain flooded my insides as I thought about the terrible things I’d said to him. I’d been desperate to drive him away, but the words had been unnecessarily cruel. And a complete lie.

“Nothing. It’s over. I’ll need a few days and then Memphis can put me back in the rotation.”

“I’ll talk to Eli about going with you. If it’s his job at the hospital-”

Anger surged through me at that and I shoved past Ronan to grab my bag from where it was sitting on the dresser in the far corner of the room. “I don’t want him to come with me and I don’t need your help! I’m fine,” I snapped as I began jamming the few clothes I’d taken out of the bag the day before back into it.

“Mav, I know you’re hurting, but this is what family does-”

“Family?” I spit out. “We’re not fucking family, Ronan. We’re employer and employee!”

I had my back turned so I didn’t see Ronan until he was on me. He grabbed me by the arm and yanked me backwards until I hit the wall. I took a swing at him, but he easily caught my fist and then pinned my arm against my side. Besting Ronan physically wasn’t possible, so I didn’t bother to struggle.

“The other thing family does is they tell one of its members when they’re being a fucking idiot. Now shut the hell up and listen to me.”

Ronan’s hold on me eased, but he didn’t release me and I found I was suddenly too tired to care. I’d let him say his piece and then I’d get the fuck out of this city for good.

“Stop running, Mav,” Ronan suddenly whispered.

The drop in his voice was so dramatic that I focused my eyes on him.

“Just stop and look around you for a minute. Hawke, Tate, Matty, Seth, me…you’ve got us whether you like it or not. We are not going anywhere, no matter how hard you push us away, do you hear me?”

I hated that a little spark inside of me fluttered to life. I hated that even as Ronan released me, a part of me wished he hadn’t. I managed a nod, though I wasn’t sure what I was agreeing to. I couldn’t deal with this shit right now. Maybe not ever.

“Let us help you, Mav,” Ronan said gently, too gently.

I nodded again, my throat feeling too dry to actually speak. I pushed off the wall, but found it hard to do anything else.

“Tell me what else you need,” Ronan murmured.

“Take him home,” I whispered. “Please.”

“Mav-”

“I can’t have him here, Ronan,” I said simply, hoping like hell Ronan would just take my word for it and not ask any more questions.

He studied me for a long time and then nodded. “I’ll have Seth text you once the plane is ready.”

As Ronan turned to go, I grabbed his arm. Pain spiraled through my belly as I whispered, “Take care of him, Ronan.”

“I’ll keep him safe,” Ronan promised and then he patted me on the shoulder. “When you get back, we’ll figure everything out.”

I nodded, but said nothing.

Because I had no intention of coming back to Seattle. Not for my Harley, not for the family Ronan had so easily proclaimed me to be a part of, and definitely not for the man I’d somehow managed to fall completely in love with without even realizing it.