Watch Me

A couple taps, a beat, a couple more taps, two beats and then one tap. He repeated the motion over and over. I wondered if he even realized he was doing it.

"Long day?" I asked softly.

I fully expected him to ignore me as he had the past several days, but he surprised me again when he said, "Not long enough."

“Things going okay with the deal?" I asked.

Jude straightened his head and opened his eyes to look at me. He seemed to be trying to figure out if I was genuinely interested or not. I remained silent and held his gaze.

"Last-minute negotiations," he murmured. "They happen all the time. Just have to work through them one by one. It's still frustrating as hell, though," he admitted.

"I bet," I responded.

I fully expected him to nod off again, but he kept his eyes on me, at least for a few moments, and then he looked out the window. Then his eyes were back on me. I got the impression that he was trying to figure me out.

“Why did you leave the military?" he suddenly asked. He seemed to realize the personal nature of his question because he quickly tore his eyes from mine and said, "Sorry, it's none of my business. Never mind."

It was on the tip of my tongue to point out that not only had he said more than five words to me, he'd also actually apologized, but I kept that thought to myself and said, "It wasn't what I thought it would be."

"What did you think it would be?" Jude asked.

I shrugged, ready to pass the whole conversation off with some flippant response, but when my mouth opened, words I hadn't intended to say came pouring out. "That my heart would matter more than my name."

This time, I was the one looking out the window. I waited for Jude to ask me what I meant, but he said nothing. I was strangely disappointed at his lack of interest. But then he said, "Your loyalty was questioned because you’re Russian."

My eyes pinned his before I gave him a brief nod.

"Fuck," Jude muttered to himself. "Nikolai, I'm sorry. When I said what I did the other day about this not being your country—"

I shook my head because I'd already dismissed his jab about my loyalties. Okay, maybe I hadn't dismissed it exactly, but I’d forced it out of my mind. I hadn't wanted the disappointment of knowing when it came to my last name, he was like everyone else. I hadn’t wanted it to color my ability to protect him.

"It is what it is," I said simply.

I swore I heard Jude whisper, “It shouldn’t be,” but when I looked at him to confirm it, he was staring out the window.

“So how long is this going to go on?" Jude asked. “You can’t follow me around forever.”

I was glad at the topic change. The last thing I was interested in talking to Jude about was my personal life and most certainly not something that pushed my buttons like my heritage. "For as long as your boss thinks you need it," I responded.

Jude sighed. "Those notes that Cliff… that Mr. Hayes got, the ones that we don't even know for sure are actually talking about me…" Jude began.

I held my tongue despite the fact that I wanted to say that I was absolutely certain the notes were talking about him.

"There's no evidence to prove that the threats are anything more than that," he finished.

The fact that he was even talking about the notes gave me hope. So rather than just assure him I knew what the hell I was talking about, I asked, “What about the picture?"

It struck me that Jude was the kind of guy who might need to talk himself into something. Maybe he wasn't big on blind faith. He needed to understand the logic and reasoning behind something rather than just taking someone else's word for it. I couldn't really blame him for that. Trust was something that was earned, not given.

"The picture was of me outside the office," Jude said. “Anyone who works for Mr. Hayes could've taken it. You may have noticed I’m not exactly Mr. Popular at work.”

I had noticed. The rumors and innuendo about Jude and how he was climbing the corporate ladder so quickly were endless. And he wasn’t exactly beloved for his icy personality.

“If anything, this is all some shakedown for money. Putting my life on hold just gives the asshole behind all this more power. Like I said, we don't even know that all three notes are from the same person—"

"Yes, we do," I said. "Look at the wording, the handwriting. And whoever’s behind this has something personal against you or Mr. Hayes. No one is asking you to put your life on hold, Jude. I'm asking you to take a few extra precautions here and there."