The man wasn't quite as tall or well-built as Nik but he was about the same age and had that same military bearing that I was so used to seeing on Nikolai.
"Mr. Archer," the man said as he extended his hand. "My name is Mike Smithfield. I own Smithfield Security Solutions."
I shook the man's hand and opened my mouth to ask where Nikolai was again, but then snapped it shut. It was none of my business where he was, nor did I care. That's what I kept telling myself as I nodded at Mike and then allowed him to escort me the final few steps to the car. I should've been relieved to escape Nikolai for a day, but that wasn't what I was focused on.
"Is Nik okay?" I asked before I could stop myself. I did manage to at least pretend to be looking at my phone in the process, though.
"Oh, yeah," Mike said. "Just a personal issue he needed to deal with."
I wanted to know what that meant, but I couldn't very well ask. I nodded my head.
"Are you ready to go home or did you want to go to work?" Mike asked politely. Like Nikolai, I was sure he had assumptions about my relationship with Cliff, but he didn't hint at it in any way.
"Home first, then work," I murmured but even as I was saying the words, I realized the very last thing I wanted to do was go to work.
Personal issue? What the hell did that even mean? Did that mean he had an appointment or was it something more serious? Or maybe he had a date?
I hadn't allowed myself to really think about whether or not Nikolai swung my way, but now that I was thinking about it, I was hoping it was true. I was certain I'd felt something between us when he'd held me against my bathroom door, but I'd been pretty preoccupied with a certain fantasy in my head so I hadn't been paying as much attention to him and how he was reacting. In any case, it didn't matter if he was with a guy or girl, I still saw red. Or green, rather.
God, how had I gone from trying to escape the man to now obsessing over his absence and imagining him wrapped around someone else?
With my nerves completely shot, I knew there was no hope of focusing on anything. Moreover, I didn't want to be around any people. The ringing in my ears was making my head pound. I was certain that if even one person spoke to me, my thoughts would shatter into a million pieces. I sent Simon—who had somehow managed to retain his position despite his ineptitude, probably because I’d felt a little sorry for the whole being held at gunpoint thing—a text that I wouldn't be in the office and then told Mike the same.
As the SUV navigated the early morning traffic, I gave in to the feeling of being run over by a truck. I knew it had to be the combination of stress and long hours. I would've loved to have been one of those people who could handle weeks and months of nonstop work, but the limitations of my brain wouldn't allow for that. It required downtime and if I tried to force it beyond its capabilities, I paid dearly for it.
Once the SUV reached my building, Mike escorted me to my apartment. I was glad when he didn't press to enter my residence to look through it. It was something Nikolai had given up on, though he’d continued to do it whenever we’d arrived at the office in the morning. It made me wonder if he’d told Mike not to push to sweep my apartment.
"Is there anything else you need, Mr. Archer?" Mike asked.
"No," I said because he couldn’t give me what I needed. What I needed was a dark room and silence.
And a pair of strong arms to hold me until the world felt normal again…
"I'm here if you need me," Mike said, his voice interrupting the all-too-real sensation of having Nikolai’s body pressed up against the back of mine. "Oh, and by the way, I wanted to thank you for what you did for Nikolai."
I was in the process of entering my apartment, so I turned to look at him and said, "What I did?"
"Dropping the charges like that," Mike said. "I know Nik can be a little rough around the edges, but he takes his job seriously. Not making excuses for what he did that night, but I know it came from a good place. I also know he was willing to take responsibility for what he did. Still, any kind of record would have tanked his career prospects and he just can't afford that right now. Not with what his family…"