Watch Me

"That's great, Jude. Congratulations. I'm really proud of you."

His eyes shifted to me for a moment before he dropped them again. Since his skin was so pale, it was easy to see the hint of pink that stained his cheeks.

"You ready to go?" I asked.

Jude nodded. We didn't talk after that and Jude managed to stay awake in the car as we headed back to his apartment. I’d given Andy a heads-up to meet us at Jude's place, but by the time we got back to Jude’s apartment, it was just me and Jude. At Jude’s door, I found myself reluctant to let him go as he stepped into his doorway.

"Why don't you let me come in and make you something to eat?" I suggested. "I make a mean omelet."

For a moment, I actually thought Jude would take me up on my offer. But then he glanced at the small gap in the door. When his eyes met mine again, they were heavy with some kind of emotion that I couldn't name. He actually closed the door just a little bit more as if he were afraid I’d see into his apartment.

Despite having shadowed him for weeks, I still hadn't been in his private space. I couldn’t really make sense of his reluctance to let me into his apartment, but my imagination was in overdrive. Maybe he had pictures of him and Hayes in there that he didn’t want me to see. Or maybe it was about him not wanting to lose the last of his privacy. In any case, I didn't press it.

"Some other time, maybe," I suggested. I supposed I should be glad that he was even talking to me at all.

“Good night, Nikolai," Jude murmured as he slipped through the door and shut it behind him. I heard the lock engage. I lifted my hand to knock on the door so I could remind him to eat and drink something before he went to sleep but I caught myself before my fingers made contact with the wood. What he did behind closed doors was none of my business. I was there to keep him safe from threats.

Nothing more.

I dropped my hand and turned my back so I could face the hallway. While I waited for Andy, I tried to remind myself over and over that Jude Archer was just a job.

But I knew it was a lie. He had stopped being a job a long time ago. And fuck if that wasn't a problem.

An inconvenient, career-ending kind of problem.

Less than fifteen minutes later, the door behind me suddenly opened again. I turned to see Jude standing in the crack of the door that was barely big enough for just his body.

"What's wrong? Are you all right?" I asked, immediately concerned that he wasn't feeling well. I found myself reaching out to touch him just so I could see if he was any warmer than he’d been in the SUV earlier in the evening.

“No, I'm fine," he said as he pulled away from me. The move hurt like a son of a bitch.

"Did you need something?" I asked as I tried to mask my disappointment.

"I, um…" Jude began as he dropped his eyes. I didn't press him because I knew sometimes he needed a little extra time to figure out what he wanted to say. But when he spoke his next words, my blood ran cold. "I think someone's been in here."

"In your apartment?" I said, even as I put my hand on the door, intending to push it open. Jude refused to move and was hanging on to the door handle in such a way that I couldn't push the door open without hurting him.

"Jude, I need to come in," I urged. I kept my voice low and even, though I fought every instinct to force the door open so I could search the apartment. The idea that whoever had been in his place could still be there was making me crazy.

Jude nodded but refused to make eye contact with me. I couldn't make sense of his reluctance. I understood his need for privacy, but the threat of danger should have had him forgetting all about that. He finally released his hold on the door and allowed me to push it open.

"Stay behind me," I said as I pulled my gun from the holster at my back. Most of the lights in the apartment were off as I entered it. I completely ignored everything about the space except for the potential areas someone could hide in. I worked my way through the apartment, sweeping it room by room while keeping Jude behind me in case there was any kind of attack.

When I was satisfied that the place was empty besides the two of us, I put my gun away and took Jude's hand and led him back to the living room. It was only then that I started to notice things about the space.