Forgotten Luca (The Four 1)

Remy was tense in my embrace, but his fingertips were rubbing over the muscles of my chest.

"I want to try," he murmured, his eyes still downcast.

My heart sank. If he wasn't a hundred percent committed to marrying me, I didn't know what I’d do. "I love you, Remy, but I can't do some kind of trial relationship…"

Remy jerked his head up. "What?" he asked in surprise and then he began shaking his head vehemently. "No, no, that's not what I meant. I want to be your husband for real. But I…" His words hung for a moment and then he said, "I want to be your husband out there." He looked in the direction of our bedroom door. "But I also want to be your husband in here," he added firmly.

Understanding dawned and I felt like an idiot. "We will be, no matter what happens in this room," I said. "I love every moment I spend with you, Remy, but sex can play as much or as little of a part in our lives as we want. And there's no rush to figure that out.”

"But if I can't… can't…" Remy said as he took a step back from me. "If I can't, then we need to talk about maybe you finding someone who can—"

I grabbed him by the arms and gave him a tiny jerk to get his attention. It was all I could do to keep my anger in check. "No way, not happening. We do this and I'm yours and you’re mine and that's it. I'm not interested in any kind of open relationship or special arrangements. Our marriage will be what we make it. And if that means my hand and my dick need to become best friends, that's fine."

Remy stepped forward and began caressing my arms and chest like he was trying to soothe me. I supposed I had gotten a bit passionate about the issue.

"I still want to try," Remy murmured. His finger slipped down to the buttons at the bottom of my shirt. He began untucking it.

"Sweetheart, we don't have to do it this way now. I'm very ready to know what it's like to have you inside of me," I said softly as I leaned down so I could run my mouth along his jaw. He tipped his head back to give me access to his throat.

"Let's call that Plan B," he said. He managed to get my shirt loose and open. His warm hands slid over my sides and then over my back as he continued to move his head in different directions so I had easy access to all the parts of his throat. I let him push the shirt off my shoulders, but since he'd forgotten to undo the buttons at my wrists, the fabric didn't go very far. Not that I cared, because I had a plan of my own.

I dropped to my knees in front of Remy as I continued to caress his chest with my hands and mouth. Remy seemed lost in a sensual haze as I loved on his body. But when I went to open his pants, he snapped out of it and dropped his hands to mine to stop them. "What—what are you doing?" he asked.

"Did you want the play-by-play?" I teased as I tugged my hands free and ran my knuckles over the bulge behind the thin material. "Because I'm good with that," I said with a grin.

Remy laughed and said, "No, I just thought you would want me to… since you're going to be the one to…"

If he’d been any other man, his comments would've been adorable, but knowing what caused them only managed to hurt my heart. Remy had never known pleasure when it came to sex; he’d never been on the receiving end of it. He’d assumed that since I'd be the one taking him, he’d have to get me ready. It was a sign that he probably wasn't expecting to get much out of the encounter.

I climbed back to my feet and drew him against my body. I kissed him deeply until he was completely pliant in my arms. "Do you trust me, Remy?" I asked.

"Yes," he said without hesitation.

"Remember what you said about needing to feel? That's what I need you to do, Remy. Just feel."

Remy nodded and drew in a deep breath like he was gathering his courage. Then he was reaching for the back of my head and drawing me down for a kiss. A deep, dirty, consuming kiss. I let him control our mouths for several minutes until I once again felt his body relax and then I worked my way down to the floor again, exploring his body with my hands and mouth. I was glad he was wearing his pajamas because it made it easy to manipulate the fabric.