Sanctuary Found (Pelican Bay 2)

God help me, between his voice and his striking eyes, it was like being sucked into the eye of a storm. Hell was raging all around me, but all I felt was this momentary weird sense of calm.

“I didn’t do anything last night,” I murmured.

He actually pulled me a little closer to him. “Yes, you did,” he said so softly I almost didn’t hear him. “Fuck, Isaac, I’m so sorry.” He shook his head. “If I’d thought even for a second it would drive you to this…” His hand tightened on my arm momentarily, then gentled. Then, to my disbelief, his fingers came up to wipe at some of the remaining lipstick on my mouth, but his touch was soft. “I want to kill him for doing that to you.”

His voice was so low it sounded scary, and I knew he was talking about my trick. I couldn’t make any sense of this. The guy didn’t like me and he sure as shit wasn’t gay, but the way he was touching me and his anger, it almost seemed like he was… jealous.

I knew that wasn’t possible, so it had to be the guilt he was feeling.

“I didn’t do anything to that guy,” I suddenly blurted out, though I had no idea why. I didn’t owe Maddox any kind of explanation. No, he hadn’t forced me to do any of this, but the reality was that I had only done it because of my car. I would have done it eventually in some other city, though, so it didn’t seem fair to make it sound like it was solely on him. “I touched him, but that was it. Only long enough to get the condom on.”

Jesus, Isaac, shut the fuck up.

“But you brushed your teeth,” Maddox blurted.

I felt my cheeks heat. “Yeah, well, whenever I, um, am… working… I brush my teeth before and after, no matter what.”

Oh God, I needed to stop talking. Why the hell did he need to know that I hated what I did so much that it made bile rise into the back of my throat every single time?

Maddox looked horrified, but to my surprise, he didn’t pull away. In fact, he stepped even closer to me and I instinctively moved back.

But there was no place to go.

The wall was hard at my back as Maddox studied me like a bug under a microscope. His eyes were… dear god, they were on my mouth. His fingers were still there too.

Why was he touching me? Why wasn’t he telling me what a disgusting freak I was for selling my body?

Why the hell was I not moving?

This man was the only reason I was in this shit hole. He was the reason I’d lied to Dallas and Nolan when I’d asked if they could watch Newt for me while I walked to the store to buy Newt some snow pants and better winter gear. Hell, they’d even offered to let me borrow Dallas’s truck. I’d whittled down the half-dozen responses I’d gotten to my online ad to find a few guys who hadn’t appeared particularly dangerous and had been willing to pay my normal rates. Then I’d had to steel myself to meet them and let them use me in the vilest of ways, all because of this man.

This man who was still touching my mouth.

What the hell was happening?

“I like the other stuff,” Maddox said softly as the rough pad of his finger trailed along my lower lip, dragging briefly over my piercing that was just to the left of the middle of my lip. My cock wasn’t the only part of my body responding. I couldn’t stop the little tremors that began swimming through my body.

“What other stuff?” I managed to ask.

God, he really needed to stop touching me.

So why wasn’t I telling him that?

“The shiny stuff.” He shook his head. “The red, it isn’t… you,” he said on a quiet sigh.

What?

What?

Was he seriously upset by the lipstick, but he liked the clear gloss I typically wore?

Jesus, what was happening here?

“The lipstick was his,” I suddenly said. “The guy,” I said, motioning toward the door with just my eyes. “He wanted me to wear it. He brought it with him.”

What the hell are you doing, Isaac?

Hell if I knew. But now that I’d opened my mouth, it was like I couldn’t shut it again. It was like Maddox had found the secret door to Narnia the second he’d touched my lip because it was all just spilling out.

“Every guy’s got his kinks, you know. Some like to tie you up, others want you to say certain stuff…”

Maddox’s jaw hardened, and his eyes turned flinty.

Shut up, Isaac.

But I couldn’t. It was like I was in some kind of trance and the only way I’d escape it was if he looked away. And he seemed in no hurry to do so.