But that day had been proof that I could control it.
Jimmy had recovered fully from the injuries I’d inflicted on him. My mother had as well. I’d expected her to try and get Jimmy out of jail or at least stand up for him in court when he went on trial for the assault on Gentry, but she’d only sat quietly in the courtroom. We hadn’t spoken and she’d left as soon as Jimmy had been found guilty. My brother wasn’t facing a lot of jail time for what he’d done to the bear at the sanctuary, but between the crimes against me that he was charged with and the assault on our mother, he wasn’t getting out of prison anytime soon. Uncle Curtis had been charged with several obstruction charges and was serving a short sentence in jail. He’d tried and failed to smear Cam’s name in Pelican Bay, but no one had cared. They’d seen for themselves the job that Cam did. He was tough when he needed to be, but easygoing, fair, and respectful too. He’d made people see that he was there to keep our community safe and he didn’t use strong-arm tactics and lies like Uncle Curtis had.
Surprisingly, very few people in Pelican Bay had taken issue with Cam’s and my relationship. Yes, there were a handful who believed we were going to hell and all that bullshit, but Cam and I just didn’t concern ourselves with people like that. Besides our little family that had rechristened Fright House into Chaos House, we spent a lot of time with Dallas and Maddox, their men, and Newt. Sawyer was still a fixture at our weekly dinners too. I’d finished painting all the murals at the sanctuary, at least until more buildings went up on the property. Cam had encouraged me to keep pursuing my art as a career and it was with his blessing that I’d quit my dishwashing job so I could paint full-time. Chaotic Creations wasn’t bringing in buckets of money, but I was able to sell enough of my work to help cover the monthly bills. Walter had sold his house after we’d asked him to move in with us permanently and while we hadn’t ever expected him to pitch in financially, he’d insisted on paying his share of the bills too.
“Fuck,” I muttered.
Today was absolutely not the day I wanted to deal with my mother. I’d been expecting the official kiss-off from her at some point, but I wasn’t emotionally ready to deal with it.
“Do you want me to ask her to go?” Cam asked. He didn’t remove his hand from my thigh. My mother had gotten out of the car but hadn’t moved toward us. Her eyes fell to where Cam was touching me, but surprisingly, she didn’t react other than to drop her eyes to the ground.
“No,” I said. “I just want to get this over with.”
I stood and then reached my hand down for Cam’s. I didn’t give a shit if my mother was expecting privacy. This was Cam’s and my home.
“Hello,” my mother said stiffly as we reached her. Then she thrust a small piece of paper at me. I took it but didn’t open the folded page.
“What is this?” I asked. I didn’t really feel like committing one of her bible scriptures to memory.
“She’s living in California now. San Diego. That’s her address.”
“Who?” I asked.
“Your aunt Grace,” she said. She crossed her arms. “But I guess you know she’s not really that to you, don’t you?”
I nodded. “Why are you giving me this?” I asked.
My mother looked around the property and then back at the hands Cam and I still had joined.
“She was our father’s favorite,” my mother murmured. “Our mother died when Grace was only five. She was beautiful like our mother… looked just like her. So Father spoiled her terribly. I was expected to take care of the house and…” My mother’s words dropped off. She was as stiff as a rail. “He didn’t understand how much trouble Grace could get into. He indulged her every whim. When he died, she just became more and more reckless. I tried to protect her, to keep her in the church and following God’s word. But when she told me she was pregnant… she was a child. She had no business having a baby.”
“So you raised me. Told people I was yours,” I said.
“You were ours,” my mother responded. “Your father and I loved you like you were our own.”
“No you didn’t,” I said without hesitation.
My mother dropped her eyes. “I know it didn’t seem like we did… that we favored Jimmy—”
“You did,” I interrupted. “Are you actually going to try and convince me otherwise?”
Cam squeezed my hand and I realized it was because I’d started raising my voice. I pulled in a breath as I focused on Cam’s thumb rubbing across mine.