Do you know anything about
the Heart of Aphrodite?
DUKE
(Under his breath.)You’re just determined to keep me from having any fun aren’t you?
(Cut to a one shot of the tour guide.)
TOUR GUIDE
Actually, I do.
(The tour guide provides a voiceover while the scene dissolves into a series of ancient looking paintings that depict the events as they are being described.)
TOUR GUIDE
According to legend; a very long time ago the goddess of love, Aphrodite, was wed to Hephaestus, the craftsman god. Although Aphrodite cared deeply for him, she was by nature a free spirit and grew weary of spending her days alone with the unadventurous deity. Soon her gaze shifted toward the fair men below Mount Olympus. One day she told Hephaestus that she was going down to answer a mortal’s prayers. Hephaestus kissed Aphrodite goodbye and watched her leave. What he did not know was that she left to lay with another man. When she returned to Mount Olympus Hephaestus greeted her with enthusiasm and presented her with a sculpture that he had crafted for her while she was away. As the years went by Aphrodite would be unfaithful many more times and each time she left Hephaestus would prepare a gift for her return. Finally one day she returned to her husband to find him sulking but ready with another sculpture. When she asked what was troubling him Hephaestus stated that he had grown lonesome from his wife leaving so often. Aphrodite looked around the room and saw all of the gifts that she had received. Each one was a painful reminder of her betrayal. At that moment the guilt became too much for her to bear so she tore out her heart and cast it below to the world of mortals. It is said that if anyone finds that heart, Aphrodite will be compelled to grant that person any wish within her power on the last day of the festival of love.
(The scene dissolves back only now the camera pans away from the tour guide and focuses in on a display by the back wall. The display is of a large crystal ball embedded in a small stone pedestal.)
TOUR GUIDE
(Gesturing toward the display.) If you all will turn your attention to the display behind me. Here we have what experts believe to be a map to Aphrodite’s Heart. The only descriptions we’ve found on it say “Hidden underneath the glass lies the true path.”
(The tour guide continues to talk in the background while the camera cuts to a medium shot of Duke and Wilt.)
DUKE
Well that settles it then. We’ll just have to sneak in the museum tonight and steal the shiny ball.
WILT
But you can’t just do that!
DUKE
Why not? First we’ll tell them that I’m a representative from NASA and then you-
WILT
Duke! There are going to be security guards, not some bottle blonde bimbos at a bar.
DUKE
Try saying that three times fast.
WILT
Please try to take this a little more seriously.
DUKE
Alright, let me think.
(While thinking Duke looks across the room over at two security guards standing by a trash can. Cut to a medium shot of the security guards. One is vomiting violently into the trash can while the other watches with concern.)
MUSEUM GUARD 1