She knew it was the best advice she could get. "Thanks. "
"Now lets talk about the important shit, like names. You dont have to name her after me. Tallulah sort of sucks. No wonder dopehead picked it, but my middle name is Rose. Thats not so bad . . . "
The rest of the afternoon passed in quiet conversation. They avoided talk of the baby and focused on inconsequential things. By the time theyd left the restaurant and driven back to town, Kates desperation had eased. It wasnt gone, but having a plan of action helped.
When Tully parked behind the houseboat, Kate gave her friend a fierce hug and said goodbye.
Alone in Johnnys house, she changed into a pair of sweats and an old T-shirt, then went into the living room to wait for him.
As she sat there, knees pressed together (too late for that), her hands clasped, she listened to the ordinary sounds of this life shed grown accustomed to—the slap of the waves on the pilings around her, the squawking of seagulls, the ever-present chug of a motorboat going past. It had never felt quite so fragile before, or so bittersweet. All her life shed imagined love as a durable thing, a polyester emotion that could handle the wear and tear of everyday action, but now she saw how dangerous that perception was. It lulled you, put you at risk.
Across the room, the lock clicked and the door opened. Johnny smiled when he saw her. "Hey, there. I called you before I left the office. Where were you?"
"I played hooky with Tully. "
"Happy hour, huh?" He pulled her up into his arms and kissed her.
She let herself melt against him. When she put her arms around him, she found that she couldnt let go.
She held on so tightly he had to actually pull her away. "Katie?" he said, stepping back enough to look down at her. "Whats wrong?"
In the last hour shed imagined a dozen different ways to tell him, to ease him into the news, but now, standing here in front of him, she saw what a waste all those plans were. This wasnt a gift that could be wrapped in pretty paper and she wasnt the kind of woman who could stay silent.
"Im pregnant," she said in as firm a voice as she could manage.
He stared at her for an eternity, uncomprehending. "Youre what? How did that happen?"
"The normal way, Im pretty sure. "
He let out a long, slow breath and sank to the sofa. "A baby. "
"I didnt mean for it to happen. " She sat down beside him. "I dont want you to feel trapped. "
The smile he gave her was a strangers, not the one she loved, that crinkled up his eyes and made her smile back. "You know how much I want to just pick up and leave when Im finally ready. Follow a big story and redeem myself. Its been in my head for so long . . . ever since I screwed up in El Salvador. "
She swallowed hard, nodded. Her eyes stung, but she refused to draw attention to her tears by wiping them away. "I know. "
He reached out, touched her flat stomach. "But I couldnt just leave anymore, could I?"
"Because of the baby?"
"Because I love you," he said simply.
"I love you, too, but I dont want to—"
He slid off the couch, positioned himself on one knee, and she drew in a sharp breath. "Kathleen Scarlett Mularkey, will you marry me?"
She wanted to say yes, scream it, but she didnt dare. Fear was still too much a part of how she felt. So she had to say instead, "Are you sure, Johnny?"
And then, finally, she saw his smile. "Im sure. "
Kate had taken Tullys advice—of course—and gone for timeless elegance. Her wedding dress was an ivory silk gown with a heavily beaded bodice and an off-the-shoulder neckline. Her hair, carefully lightened in a trio of blonds, had been drawn back from her face and coiled into a Grace Kelly twist. The veil, when she put it on, would float over her face and fall down to her shoulders like a sparkling cloud. For the first time in her life she felt movie-star beautiful. Mom thought so, too; she took one look and started to cry. A few moments ago she had hugged Kate fiercely, kissed her cheek, and gone into the church, leaving Kate and Tully alone for the first time all day.
Now, standing in front of a full-length mirror that captured her fairy-tale reflection, Kate glanced over at Tully, whod been uncharacteristically quiet on this grand poobah of hair and makeup days. Dressed in the pale pink strapless taffeta bridesmaids gown, she looked vaguely out of place and fidgety.
"You look like youre gearing up for a funeral instead of a wedding. "
Tully looked at her, trying to make a smile look real, but theyd been friends too long to pass each other such counterfeit emotions. "Are you sure about getting married? I mean really sure? Theres no—"