Firefly Lane (Firefly Lane 1)

Marah took it, put it to her ear. "Daddy?" Marahs voice instantly softened and tears filled her eyes.

Kate felt a clutch of jealousy. How was it that Johnny had maintained such a lovely relationship with their daughter when it was Kate who was practically the kids indentured servant?

"Guess what, Daddy? Remember that movie I told you about, the one where the girl finds out that her aunt is really her mom? I went to see it today and it was totally . . . What? Oh. " Her voice fell to a near-whisper. "During fourth period, but . . . I know. " She listened for a few moments and then sighed. "Okay. Bye, Dad. " Marah hung up the phone and handed it back to Kate. For a split second, she was a little girl again. "I cant go see the movie this weekend. "

Kate wanted nothing more than to seize the instants possibility and pull Marah into her arms for a hug, to hang on to her little girl for just a moment and say, I love you, but she didnt dare. Motherhood at times like this—most times—was about the steel in your spine, not the bend. "Maybe next time youll think about the consequences of an action. "

"Someday Ill be a famous actress and Ill tell the TV that you were totally no help at all. None. Ill give all the credit to Aunt Tully, who believes in me. " She got out of the car and started walking.

Kate followed, fell into step beside her. "I believe in you. "

Marah snorted. "Ha. You never let me do anything, but as soon as I can Im moving in with Tully. "

"When hell freezes over," she muttered under her breath. Thankfully, she and her daughter had no more opportunity to speak. When they stepped into the school, the principal was waiting for them.

The summer before Marah started high school was hands down the worst summer of Kates life. A thirteen-year-old daughter in middle school had been bad; in retrospect, though, it looked a hell of a lot better from a distance. A fourteen-year-old girl getting ready for high school was worse.

It didnt help that for the last year Johnny had been working sixty hours a week, either.

"You are not going to wear jeans that show the crack of your butt to school," Kate said, striving to keep her voice even. In her busy end-of-the-summer schedule, shed budgeted four hours to buy Marahs school clothes. Theyd been in the mall two hours already and the only thing in their arms was hostility.

"Everyone is wearing these jeans at the high school. "

"Everyone except you, then. " Kate pressed a pair of fingertips to her throbbing temples. She was vaguely aware of the boys running through the store like banshees, but she let that go for now. If she was lucky, maybe security would come and lock her up for failing to control her children. Right now a little solitary confinement sounded heavenly.

Marah threw the jeans on a rounder and stomped off.

"Do you even know how to walk away anymore?" Kate muttered, following her daughter.

By the time they were finished, Kate felt like Russell Crowe in Gladiator: beaten, bloodied, but alive. No one was happy. The boys were whining over the Lord of the Rings action figures shed denied them, Marah was fuming over the jeans she hadnt gotten and the practically see-through blouse that had also gotten away, and Kate was angry that school shopping could so drain her energy. The only good news was that shed drawn her line in the sand and defended it. Kate hadnt completely won the day, but neither had Marah.

On the drive home from Silverdale, the car was divided into two discernible halves: the backseat was noisy, boisterous, and full of fighting; the front seat was frigid and silent. Kate kept trying to make conversation with her daughter, but every sentence was an unreturned volley; by the time theyd turned down the gravel driveway and parked in the garage, she felt utterly defeated. That vague triumph over holding the line, being a mother and not a friend, had lost its luster.

Behind her, the boys unhooked their seat belts and climbed over each other in their haste to get out. Kate knew that whoever got to the living room first controlled the remote.

"Take it easy," she said, glancing at them in the rearview mirror.

They were tangled together like lion cubs trying to crawl out of a hole.

She turned to Marah. "You got some lovely things today. "

Marah shrugged. "Yeah. "

"You know, Marah, life is full of—" Kate stopped herself midsentence and almost laughed. Shed been about to offer one of her mothers life-is speeches.

"What?"

"Compromises. You can go around seeing what you did get, or you can focus on what you didnt. The choice you make will ultimately determine what kind of woman you become. "

"I just want to fit in," Marah said in a voice that was unexpectedly small. It reminded Kate how young her daughter really was, and how frightening it was to start high school.

Kate reached out, gently tucked some hair behind Marahs ear. "Believe me, I remember the feeling. I had to wear cheap, secondhand clothes to school when I was your age. The kids used to make fun of me. "

"So you know what I mean. "

"I know what you mean, but you cant get everything you want. Its that simple. "

"Its a pair of jeans, Mom. Not world peace. "