The Things We Do for Love

It was the first time Lauren had actually seen him. He was tall--maybe six foot three--with long blond hair. He was dressed in biker clothes--worn black leather pants, heavy black boots, and a concho-encrusted black leather coat. His face reminded her of the craggy mountains in the National Forest, rough and harsh. There was no softness in his face; it was all sharp angles and deep hollows. At his throat, a multicolored tattoo coiled up from the skin beneath his collar. It was a tail. Dragon or snake, probably.

If trouble had a face, this was it.

"Hey, kid," he said, nodding, already moving past her.

She watched him leave the apartment, then looked back at Moms bedroom. She took a few steps toward the door, then paused.

Maybe this wasnt a good time.

The bedroom door cracked open. Mom came stumbling out of the room, swearing as she brushed past Lauren. "Where are my damn cigarettes?"

"On the coffee table. "

"Thanks. Man, I feel like shit. Too much partying last night. " Mom looked down at a pile of pizza boxes on the counter, smiling when she found her cigarettes. "Youre home early. What gives?"

"Im pregnant. "

Mom looked up sharply. The cigarette dangled from her mouth, unlit. "Tell me youre kidding. "

Lauren moved closer. She couldnt help herself. No matter how often shed been disappointed in the past, she always believed--or hoped--that this time would be different, and right now she longed to be held and comforted, to be told, Its okay, honey, even though she knew it would be a lie. "Im pregnant," she said, softer this time.

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Mom slapped her across the face. Hard. They both looked stunned by the suddenness of the movement.

Lauren gasped. Her cheek stung like hell, but it was Mom who had tears in her eyes.

"Dont cry," Lauren said. "Please. "

Mom stood there, staring at her, that cigarette still dangling from her mouth.

In her pink, low-rise pants and cropped white shirt, she should have looked like a teenager. Instead, she looked like a disappointed old woman. "Didnt you learn anything from me?" She leaned back against the rough stucco wall.

Lauren went to stand beside her. Their shoulders touched, but neither one reached for the other. Lauren stared dully at the messy kitchen, trying to remember what shed even hoped her mother would say. "I need your help. "

"Doing what?"

All her life Lauren had felt alone in her mothers presence, but never more than now. "I dont know. "

Mom turned to her. The sadness in her makeup-smeared eyes was worse than the slap. "Get rid of it," she said tiredly. "Dont let one mistake ruin everything for you. "

"Was that all I ever was? Just your mistake?"

"Look at me. Is this the life you want?"

Lauren swallowed hard, wiped her eyes. "Its a baby, not . . . nothing. What if I wanted to keep it? Would you help me?"

"No. "

"No? Just like that, no?"

At last her mother touched her. It was sad and soft and hardly lasted any time at all. "I paid for my mistake. Im not paying for yours. Trust me on this. Have an abortion. Give yourself a chance in life. "

ARE YOU SURE?

The question had kept Angie wide awake last night.

"Damn you, Mira," she muttered.