“I couldn’t … wake you up. I sat here every day, holding your hand, talking to you, playing your favorite music. I did everything I could think of to reach you, but … day after day, you just lay there. ” His voice fell to a throaty whisper. “I knew I was losing you. ”
“Why Julian?”
He let out a long, sighing breath. “Because, Mikaela, I knew. ”
She felt her heart skip a beat. “Knew what?”
“That you never completely stopped … loving him. ”
For a heartbeat, she forgot to breathe. “You loved me very much. ” She couldn’t keep the wonder from her voice. She could never remember feeling this way before, this awesome mixture of joy and sadness, this feeling of being … loved deeply and completely. Julian’s love wasn’t like that. It was a blast of red-hot fireworks that exploded in Technicolor around you, but when it died, it left a cold, black sky behind.
“I still do,” he said, smiling down at her with a sadness that wrenched her heart.
“I must have loved you, too. ”
He paused a moment too long before answering. “Yes. ”
And she knew. “I stayed in love with Julian, didn’t I?” Somehow it hurt, that realization. “I hurt you,” she said softly, sadly. “Did I know it?”
“I hope not. ”
She gazed up at him. “I’m sorry. ”
There was more to say, and no way she could think of to say it all. How could you apologize for what you couldn’t remember?
Or worse, for what you were afraid you were going to do all over again?
It began simply enough, with the whooshing sound of the electronic doors opening. Julian sat in the lobby, staring at the wall clock. The slim black hands seemed to be stuck at 2:45. Liam was in with Kayla now, and he’d asked Julian to wait for him.
“Hey, Juli. ”
Julian looked up and saw Val sauntering toward him. Instead of his usual faded jeans and movie T-shirt, his agent was wearing a black Hilfiger suit with a dyed-to-match silk shirt and tie. His blond hair had been recently styled and cut; only a fringe of curls lay against his shoulders. He hadn’t bothered to remove the Ray-Bans that shielded his eyes.
Julian would have smiled if he hadn’t felt so damned bad. “This is Last Bend, you idiot, not Cannes. The only designer they know around here is L. L. Bean. ” He got to his feet and turned.
That’s when he saw them. Outside, beyond the wall of windows that flanked the front doors, the vans and rental cars were already lining up. People in rumpled black clothes streamed out of those cars like locusts, gathering in a semicircle.
He’d seen it enough times to know the sequence by heart. The media circus coming to town. “Jesus, Val, what did you do?”
Val lifted his hands, Christ-like. “You’re white-hot, Juli. A few words whispered in a few ears and the story spread like wildfire. I have to admit, I didn’t expect this kind of turnout. ”
“Goddamn it, Val, I told you not to—” He stopped. It was too late. They’d seen him.
Reporters swarmed through the doorway, microphones at the ready, cameras stationed on their shoulders. Within seconds, Julian and Val were engulfed. Val winked at him. “Too late to hide now, Juli. ”
Julian had to get them out of here. He pushed through the crowd and headed outside, into the freezing cold. The locusts followed, firing questions.
“Julian? Is it true? Have you found your Cinderella?”
“How badly is she hurt?”
“Is she still beautiful?”
“How come there’s no Kayla True registered in this hospital? Is this a hoax?”
Julian held up his hands, forcing his trademark smile. Flashbulbs popped like gum in a whore’s mouth, cords slithered across his feet. “There’s no story here, boys and girls. I’m here for the Make-a-Wish Foundation. That’s all. ”
Val thumped him on the back. Hard. “He’s too shy to tell you the truth. You all know that Juli’s first wife, Kayla, was the love of his life. Unfortunately, they were too young …” He paused and glanced around.