"Savannah, I ..." His gaze slid away from hers. Color
crept up from his collar and fanned along his jawline. "I . . ."
She was suddenly afraid of what he was going to say. Of what she was going to feel when he said it. She snatched the books to her chest and vaulted to her feet.
She started to spin away from him, but her feet tangled in the heavy woolen folds of her skirt and she stumbled sideways. Jeffie was on his feet in an instant, holding her elbow, steadying her.
"Thanks." She pulled away from him without meeting his gaze. "I gotta go now. My ma?"
"C'n I walk yah home?"
For one terrifying moment Savannah thought she was going to throw up. Shaking her head "no," she clutched her books to her chest and whirled away from him, running down the hill as fast as she could.
She was out of breath and had a stitch in her side by the time she reached Katie, who was sitting forlornly beside the road. Still breathing hard, she came up beside her baby sister and dropped to her knees in the hard-packed dirt. The books and lunch pail landed beside her with a clanking thud.
"There's somethin' wrong with me," Katie said in a small, quavering voice. "I'm stupid."
Anguish coiled around Savannah's heart and squeezed hard. "No, you ain't," she managed past the lump in her throat.
Katie plopped her trembling chin onto her bent knees and squeezed her eyes shut. Tears slipped past her thick black lashes and streaked down the puffy little-girl pinkness of her cheeks.
Savannah felt a surge of frustration and anger. Her hands curled into fists as she stared at the immense blue sky above. She wished she could tell Mama about Katie's problem, but there was no point. Mama would only laugh
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and confirm Katie's fears that she was stupid. Savannah didn't believe for a second that her mama had changed.
Daddy would help. The thought came as it always did, quickly, bringing with it a heartbeat of hope.
Then, just as quickly, it was gone, plunging Savannah back into the pit of hopelessness. Once, she'd almost told him. She'd been close, so close, at Katie's birthday party. Katie had been laughing about something?all three of them had, she remembered?and Savannah had looked across the table at her father and seen something almost magical in his eyes.
She'd thought then it was love. Her heart had skipped a beat. Anticipation and hope brought her awkwardly to her feet and drew her toward him. She'd said his name, softly. He'd looked up, met her gaze. The truth about Katie had hung on her lips, heavy and waiting. The truth about so many things ...
Suddenly the laughter ended, leaving in its wake a silence thick enough to make Savannah sick to her stomach.
He'd lurched to his feet and spun away from them, thundering across the kitchen and disappearing into the yard. Savannah had waited hours for his return, until finally, exhausted, she'd fallen asleep on the sofa.
She'd wakened in her own bed. The moment's connection with her father had been gone, leaving her to wonder if she'd imagined it. That had been about five months ago, when Katie's problem first became noticeable.
Savannah had never even been close to telling anyone again.
"Come on, Katie, let's go home," she said tiredly.
Katie looked at her. Tears magnified her eyes. "I don't want to," she whispered.
Savannah clasped her sister's small, cold hand. "I know. Neither do I."
They sat there all through the long, hot spring day, waiting
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in heavy silence for the pealing clang of the school bell that indicated it was time to leave.
"It's time," Savannah said quietly as the last metallic clang faded away.
Katie nodded, dashing the moisture from her eyes. Together, hand in hand, they got to their feet and started walking toward home. The grass-studded dirt road stretched out before them, seeming to twist beyond forever in the miles between the farm and school. Neither of them wanted to continue, but they did.
It was simple. They had nowhere else to go.