Someone knocked at the door.
For a heart-stopping moment, she thought it was Jack, then she realized he wouldn't knock. She let her breath out in a defeated sigh and slipped into her lawn nightgown.
"Come in," she called out wearily.
The door opened. Savannah and Katie stood in the doorway, their faces pale with uncertainty.
Tess tried to smile but couldn't quite manage it.
Savannah twisted her fingers together. "Is Daddy gone again?"
Sadness wrenched through Tess. The heart she thought she'd lost twisted hard. The girls?her girls?were trying so hard to be brave, not to cry. The realization reminded Tess that they were a family now. A family. None of them had to suffer alone; they had one another.
"Come on over," she said, patting the bed next to her.
They were beside her in a second, clambering up onto the big bed. Katie snuggled alongside her mother and tilted her small face up. "Will he be back?"
Tess swallowed a lump of fear. She wished she could lie. Yes, girls, I'm sure your father is fine. He knows how to take care of himself. No doubt it was the parental thing to do?say anything to ease their minds.
But as she stared down into Katie's earnest, frightened eyes, she knew she couldn't do that. They were a family now, and they'd weather their storms together. "I don't know. I wish I did."
They lapsed into silence, each lost in her own fears, her own thoughts. Tess tried to calm herself down, tried to call upon the rational scientist she'd been all her life, but she couldn't quite manage it. She was so afraid....
Focus. Concentrate.
She took a deep, ragged breath and counted silently to ten. She had to be strong now. For Jack, for the children. He was in trouble, real trouble, and he needed her. She
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needed to look at this situation with a clear head and figure out what the hell to do. How to help him.
She felt herself calm down. She was on familiar ground now. The beginning of any project was always the same. Gather data and find facts. As a scientist, she'd learned to take a particularly thorny project slowly, studying it from every angle before she began. One misstep, one rushed diagnosis, could botch the whole experiment.
She glanced down at her wrist. Tiny blue marks were just beginning to form against her pale flesh. It was tender where his fingers had squeezed. He hadn't known he was hurting her; she was almost certain. She didn't think he even knew he was touching her. Or even that she was there beside him.
When she'd called out his name, he'd looked confused and disoriented. And desperately afraid.
Fear was the key; she was sure of it.
"What are you so afraid of, Jack?" she murmured, unaware that she'd voiced the question aloud until Savannah answered her.
"Loud noises, I think."
Tess's trancelike concentration snapped. "Huh?"
"I think loud noises make him leave," Savannah said quietly. "You know, like thunder, firecrackers, rain on the roof, gunshots. When he hears noises like that, he goes ... crazy."
Tess frowned in thought, trying to analyze the information. Loud noises made him run. And then what?
How long have I been gone?
Tess's heartbeat quickened. Loud noises made him run away, and afterward, he didn't remember what he'd done or how long he'd been gone. Blackout.
She was getting closer.
Loud noises. Nighttime. Temporary amnesia. What was the connection?
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