Once in Every Life
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"No, Daddy, don't go!" Savannah flew down the steps and barreled across the road, throwing herself into Jack's arms. "Don't go, Daddy."
Katie was right behind her. Jack hugged them all for a long time, smoothing the tear-dampened hair from their faces. Then he pushed them away, too.
"I have to go."
Katie looked up at Warbass. Her little body was heaving with quiet sobs. "D-Don't tuh-ake my daddy."
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Warbass tugged on his collar and looked away. "I'm sorry, missy."
Jack reached down and grabbed a satchel from the other side of the fence. Tess saw the bag and felt a surge of anger and betrayal so strong, it obliterated her sorrow for a heartbeat. "Why didn't you tell me last night?"
He turned and looked down at her. His finger breezed across her jawline in a feather-stroke. "I couldn't. You might have talked me out of it."
"He'll be in the jail in Victoria, Miz Rafferty. You can visit anytime before the trial."
Without another glance, Jack climbed up onto the wagon.
Tess clamped a hand over her mouth to keep from screaming. Tears blurred her vision and formed a huge, aching lump in her throat. She couldn't breathe. Her knees went weak and she collapsed in a crumpled, desperate heap on the dirt road. Dust spewed from the wagon's metal wheels and clogged her nose and eyes, turning her tears into muddy, clammy streaks.
"Come back," she whispered brokenly, tasting the gritty paste of dirt on her tongue.
The wagon rumbled on.
Tess had no idea how long she sat there, crumpled in the middle of the dirt road, her cheeks streaked with muddy tears. She stared through gritty eyes at the road, waiting, desperately waiting for the wagon to reappear, for Ed to come walking up and say, I'm sorry, Miz Rafferty, it's all been a horrible mistake....
A small, strangled sob escaped her. The rock-strewn dirt road blurred before her eyes.
"Mama?" Katie shuffled toward her and dropped to her knees. "What are we gonna do?"
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"There ain't nothin' we can do," Savannah answered in a tired voice. "Daddy's goin' to jail."
Tess straightened slowly. The kids. She couldn't fall apart now. Not here in front of the children. They needed her to be strong.
Sniffling, she backhanded the tears from her eyes and glanced over at Savannah, who was standing stiff as a knife blade, her face colorless and streaked with tears.
"Come over here, Vannah," she said quietly.
Savannah moved to Tess's side and kneeled on the hard dirt beside her. Tess put an arm around each girl and drew them close.
"He didn't do it," Tess said softly, her eyes blurring with new tears at the thought. "I know that," Savannah said.
"Then why'd he say he done it?" Katie asked in a small, miserable voice that made Tess want to cry all over again. "Well, honey, that's a hard question to answer. Basically your daddy doesn't think he's a very nice person. And when you don't believe there's good inside you, you're all too willing to believe there's bad." "Oh," Katie said quietly.
"Right now your daddy can't believe in himself, so he needs us to do it for him. We're his family, and families stick together through everything." "Maybe God will help him," Katie said. "I'm sure He will, honey, but God helps those who help themselves."
"What does that mean, Mama?" Tess hugged the girls fiercely. "It means I've waited all my life for someone to love, and someone to love me." She stroked the girls' hair. "I used to dream about you guys. About being part of a family. And now that I have it, I'll be damned if I'll let it go without a fight." "I love you, Mama," Savannah whispered.
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"I love you both, too," Tess murmured in a throaty voice. "So much, it hurts. Now, let's put our heads together and figure out a plan to help your father."
After breakfast, Tess sent Savannah and Katie in search of wildflowers. She needed some time to be alone, some time to think. She walked across the porch, listening with half an ear to the whining creak of the floorboards beneath her feet.
She went down the steps and crossed to the swing, sitting on its familiar seat. Leaning back, she closed her eyes and let the soft, gentle rocking motion soothe her battered soul. As she sat there, it began to rain. Cold droplets knifed past the tree's leaves and plunked on Tess's upturned face. The quiet, ceaseless patter of the raindrops on the grass matched the beating of her heart.