23
TYLER
“Sandy’s car is finished,” Greg says, just as we’re packing up to leave for the day. I was hoping it was going to take at least another day, but Greg’s a fast worker. He obviously isn’t as worried as I am that this could end things with Sandy before they’ve even started.
“Leave it here,” I say. “I’ll tell her tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Greg rubs his grease-covered hands on a cloth.
“Yeah, tomorrow. Let’s have one more night before she can even think about leaving.”
“You’re worried she’s going to leave?”
I nod, tossing my empty bottle of water in the trashcan by the wall.
“But we’re all doing what you wanted. She’s with Damien today. Then it’s just Arden and Able to go.”
“We don’t know what’s happened with Damien,” I say. “We don’t know she’s receptive.”
“She wouldn’t have fucked me and sucked off Andrew if she wasn’t receptive.”
I close my eyes and rub my throbbing forehead at images that I should feel rage over but actually fill me with relief.
“But maybe you should talk to her about it,” Greg continues. “It seems to me that she did her best to avoid you last night.”
“She was tired,” I say, not believing my own words. From what Andrew disclosed, they stayed up late talking and whatever. Sandy was definitely using Andrew as a way of keeping her distance from me. I don’t know why. Is she angry at my idea but going through with it anyway? Or is she just fucking all of my friends as revenge for me wanting to share her? The thought of Sandy hating me that way fills me with slick black fear.
Maybe I’m using my friends in a way too. While Sandy’s with them, I don’t have to deal with what is resting unsaid between us. They’ll be an anchor for her too. If she cares for them, there’s less chance that she’ll get into her Lexus and leave us all behind.
I don’t think I can deal with losing her again.
“Leave the keys here. If she asks, we’ll tell her we need to take it out for a test drive before we can release it.”
“Okay.”
I can tell Greg doesn’t like it, but he’ll do it because I asked.
On the journey home, I message Damien with a question mark. He replies with, It’s done, and I know that Sandy’s two-thirds through the Deep Six and still here. I trust that my boys have made her feel good and will have put her needs before their own. There’s not a man in our group who’s a selfish asshole when it comes to fucking. I’ve heard enough screaming orgasms in the middle of the night to be confident of that.
At home, Sandy is wearing a pretty white dress that looks new. She’s barefoot with her shiny chestnut hair tied in a messy bun. Damien is next to her at the counter, chopping tomatoes. It’s the picture of domesticity.
“Hey,” I say. “Something smells awesome.”
“Fried chicken,” Damien says with a grin. “All homemade.”
“Fucking hell.” Arden leans over Sandy’s shoulder to take a look. There’s a platter fit for a banquet, loaded with crispy fried chicken and a bowl of potato salad with scallions.
There’s even a giant chocolate cake drizzled with a shiny chocolate topping.
It’s like I’ve stumbled into heaven.
“Go wash up,” Sandy says. She passes Damien, gently touching his shoulder as she looks for the silverware in the drawer. It’s such a small touch, but it tells me so much.
She wouldn’t touch him that way if this was about revenge. I don’t know how I could have thought that about Sandy. The mind can play funny tricks on us, forcing us to imagine the worst when the worst has already happened to us in some capacity.
As I wash my hands, I say a silent prayer that what is happening today will still be happening next year. I want to come home to this woman and find her happy and content. I want her to kiss me and touch me gently like she used to and see her the same way with my buddies.
I want the kind of home life that I never experienced before, and I want kids that will grow up surrounded by security, not exposed to hardships that would challenge even an adult.
I’ll never be the man I was four years ago. Sometimes our experiences change us for good. But maybe what I am now will be enough.
The food is awesome, and Sandy makes us laugh with tales of Damien blushing at panties in the store. Arden shares some funny high school stories where he and his brothers would all date the same girl, but she thought she was only dating one of them. Sandy’s shocked and swats Andrew on the arm, telling him she’s disappointed in him. He blames everything on Arden, which is probably true. Out of all of them, Arden’s the one who loves looking for trouble.