Chapter Twenty-Eight
I got the Forester and the tile shop job. And I missed Fisher. Sometimes I saw him mowing the lawn or working in the garage when I got back from my evening walks or jogs. Sometimes I saw him at the tile shop picking up something.
We mastered courteous.
We perfected our sibling relationship around Rory.
But mostly, I spent my time praying for the crater in my heart to heal and … missing him.
It would have been easier had I stayed angry at him, had I not known everything, had I not felt his love.
“I’m going to Texas this weekend,” I announced to Rory, Rose, and Fisher as we ate pizza and cake on a Wednesday night to celebrate Rory’s birthday.
“Oh?” Rory eyed me suspiciously from her favorite rocking chair on the porch.
“It was a last-minute decision. It’s Grandma’s and Grandpa’s fiftieth wedding anniversary, and their church is having a party for them. They invited me. Paid for my airfare. And they’ll pick me up at the airport Friday evening when I land. Just a quick getaway. I’ll be home Sunday night because I have to work Monday.”
“Well, tell them happy anniversary from me.” Rory wrinkled her nose. “Not that they’ll care. I’m not exactly the favorite daughter-in-law anymore.”
“Do you need a ride to the airport?” Fisher asked. It was a rare moment of us sharing direct conversation instead of keeping our focus on Rory or Rose like usual.
“No. I’m leaving my vehicle at the airport since I’ll be getting in late Sunday. I didn’t want anyone to worry about picking me up.” After talking to my plate because I still couldn’t look him in the eye, I did the impossible—I lifted my gaze to his for a split second.
“Okay.” The hint of a smile touched his lips. It was the Fisher smile I had come to love.
“How’s your new job going?” Rose asked.
“It’s fine. A little monotonous, but the people I work with are nice.”
Rose’s gaze slid to Fisher. He glanced away from all of us.
“I’m not implying my last job was bad or the people weren’t nice.” I should have kept my mouth shut.
Fisher grunted a laugh, gazing out in the distance.
“It’s a safer job,” Rory added.
Fisher fired me because he didn’t want to be around me after breaking up with me. It might not have been an actual breakup. We weren’t together in the traditional sense. Still, the breakup, real or not, was thick and suffocating in the air between us.
“It is …” I nodded slowly.
“Have you talked to Brendon lately?” Nice subject change from Rory. Not that I wanted to talk about Brendon in front of Fisher.
“I see him at church. And I saw him last Wednesday night at Bible study.”
“No dates?”
I shook my head. “He’s been busy studying, and I’ve been …” With a half-smile, I lifted a shoulder. “Not thinking much about dating.”
Rose continued to eye Fisher and me. If she couldn’t see the distance between us, the emotional distance between us, then she was blind.
“Well, remember what I said. It’s a good thing to cultivate the friendship first.”
No whirlwind love affairs.
Nothing forbidden.
No passion.
Was that the life I wanted?
I stole a quick glance at Fisher and his slumped shoulders, quiet demeanor, and faraway gaze. It didn’t matter what I wanted.
I was eighteen with stuff to do like … figure out what to do.
“How about you, Fisher?” Rory swiped a glob of frosting from her piece of cake and sucked it off her finger. “Rose said things fizzled out with Tiffany. Any other prospects? Or are you still content with one-night stands and a solid grip on your bachelorhood?”
Was he having one-night stands? After investing so much time in Virgin Therese, he deserved to have a normal sexual encounter that involved … sex.
“I’m going to get some more ice cream.” I grabbed my plate and headed into the house.
“Get it together,” I whispered to myself as I set my plate on the counter and rested my hands on the edge, my head hanging low.
“I thought I could use some more ice cream too.”
My head lifted as Rose shut the door behind her.
Clearing my throat, I smiled. “Yeah. Of course.” Turning, I opened the freezer.
“I think we both know you don’t want more ice cream. And neither do I.”
I closed the freezer door and leaned against it. “If you’re concerned that Fisher and I—”
“You’ve stopped … whatever you were doing.” She climbed onto a barstool. “I can see that. He’s been quite the bore lately. I’ve been making up excuses for him because Rory sees it too. You’ve actually done a better job of hiding it. Good for you.”
Good for me?
I laughed. “Well, it doesn’t feel good.”
“I know.” She gave me a sad smile.
“Do you? Do you know what it’s like to have feelings for someone and them have feelings for you, but you can’t be together because the timing in life sucks? It just …” I rolled my lips between my teeth and shook my head. “Sucks.”