“You sound like you’re trying to convince yourself of that,” Nicole points out. “Are you scared?”
“I’m fucking terrified,” I rush out. “My mom died in childbirth. I can’t go to a hospital. And I don’t know how to be a mother. I mean, look at me! You know what calmed me down today? Organizing and cleaning old bloodstains off my weapons!”
“You’re going to be great at it.” Lucas’s calm voice comes from the library doors. “Being a mother.” The knot in my chest loosens a bit. “Breathe,” he tells me, and I do just that. His arm goes around me when he sits next to me. I lean against him, pushing back all the fears, because when we’re together, we can get through anything. “And if you’re not a good mother, Eliza will be sure to tell you.”
I laugh. “Oh my god, she’s going to be the worst backseat mother.”
“I heard that,” she calls from another room. “It’s only because I care.”
“We all care,” Kristy adds. “Don’t worry, Cal. You have a literal coven to tell you when you’re wrong.”
“That is reassuring in a really weird way.” I look at Lucas, and my heart melts all over again when I see the way he looks at me. Opening my mouth to say something, I cut off when another contraction hits. This one isn’t as bad and is over fast.
“Oh my god.” Now it’s Nicole’s turn to freak out. Everyone freezes, staring at me again. Lucas is calmer this time and puts his hand on my lower back, gently rubbing the spot that’s been hurting the most recently.
“The midwife said not to call until contractions are consistently ten minutes apart,” Lucas says out loud, both informing my friends and reassuring the two of us. “And she’ll come to the house when they are seven minutes apart.” He presses his fingers a little harder against my back, and I lean forward as best I can so he can keep rubbing me. “Until then, is there anything you need, my love?”
“Food, and I’d really like to get the rest of the spell worked out. If we can cast the circle and then the square, I guess we should call it, before I have a baby, I’ll feel a lot better.”
“Then let’s get to it,” Nicole says. “Evander, Ruby, and the High Priestess are meeting us soon?”
“Yeah,” I answer. “Once things are settled at the Academy, they’ll be here.” Grim Gate is still functioning on high alert, with students closely monitored. A select group of seniors have been tasked with their final project of the school year, and detecting negative energy or demonic forces is good practice for them and a second alert system for us.
Several other covens are doing the same. Not all were willing to believe Tabatha when she warned about the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, yet no one could deny the warnings present in any sort of divination work. And there’s a dark stain of negative energy hovering over any area where the Horsemen struck, proving that the sudden flash flood that took out an entire field of crops wasn’t just bad weather.
It was supernaturally constructed to be destructive. It was made to bring pain and sorrow. Like Nicole said, the subtlety of it all is fucking scary. It would be so easy to miss the signs, to write things off as earth having a “bad year” or whatever. And then before we know it, the Horsemen will have taken over.
Which brings me back to what I’ve been working on.
“So,” I start and roll my neck. I’m not currently in pain, but I’m feeling more and more restless. I want to get up and walk for some reason. “Once we get the traps set and we can figure out what to do with the Horsemen, we need to figure out how to get them here.”
“Just go outside,” Naomi suggests seriously. “They all want you.”
“I don’t think they necessarily do,” I counter. “They made a deal with Paimon to help him get to me, but that was only so he’d bust them out of Hell. They know I can’t stop them.” I hadn’t wanted to admit it to myself. What’s the point in denying it? Not even Lucifer could stop them.
“Paimon still wants you,” Kristy starts. “Do you think the Horsemen will uphold their end of the deal?”
“Do you?” I ask, arching my eyebrows. “I mean…they got out, and with the gates being closed, it’s not like Paimon can send them back if they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.”
“That’s exactly what I was thinking,” she agrees with a sigh and looks out the window, afraid they’re just going to appear. We’ve all been on edge, and the waiting game only makes it worse.
“If they do come back, they’ll wait until they are stronger,” Lucas says. “As much as I don’t like the idea of summoning them here, it would be smart for us to attack while they are still in a weaker state.”