Once, Lizzie and I talked about opening our own bookstore; we practically ran the place ourselves anyway. But it wasn’t anything that could be a reality. I knew better than to dream for something I’d never have. Hell, I’d just barely been able to escape the shit hand I’d been dealt. I absolutely loved my tiny apartment with Lizzie and making the best with what we had. Other than Lizzie, I had nothing. Nothing worth anything. Thank God I had her.
At least I knew who I was, though. I was the tough bitch with her shit together. I knew life would get better one day and that as long as Lizzie and I were together, we’d survive and make the best of every situation. But who am I now? Devin just bulldozed his way through my life and I don’t know what’s left in the rubble. I should be grateful; I am grateful. But other emotions rage through me. Surprisingly, fear is the overriding one. Am I just supposed to lie down for him and let him knock me up? Which brings me back to my scare this morning. I need birth control.
“I need to get some things.” I bite the inside of my cheek, making a mental list. The morning-after pill is listed at the very top. “I know Liz is going to want coffee. Do you have, like, a werewolf coffeehouse?” They grin again.
“You can order whatever you want and have it delivered.”
“What if I want to go out and go shopping?” I’m sure as hell not staying here like a prisoner. Even if it is a gilded cage.
“There are a few shopping malls a few towns over. Right now may not be the best time for you to go alone with everything going on.”
“What exactly is going on?” All I know is that this morning the werewolves talked to one another silently. And I sat beside Devin with him reassuring me that I would be told everything later.
“It’s a bit of a drive but if you want to get out of here, we can take you.”
“Way to dodge the question,” I retort.
Lev throws his hands up in defeat. “Just name someplace,” he suggests and his tone is nearly pleading. “We’ll take you.”
“What about the nearest coffeehouse?”
With an uncomfortable demeanor, he tells me, “Sorry, Grace, you’ll have to order it and have it delivered, but I can take you to one of the malls after?”
I nod. That’s not a bad option.
“Let’s order Lizzie’s coffee and head out so I can pick up some stuff. Which room is hers?”
As I ask the question, Vince strolls into the kitchen wearing sweats, no shirt, and has a belt draped around his neck. The buckle of it hits him in the chest a few times while he walks and a look of irritation crosses his face before he swings it over one shoulder.
“Yo, what’re you guys talking about?” He grins mischievously, heading to the fridge.
“Shopping trip.” Jude gives a clipped response.
“Ah, I think Veronica said she wanted to go out and get coffee.” My lips purse at the mention of Veronica.
“Do you like it when she calls you ‘pup?’” I blurt out but the question is riddled with my judgmental tone. Shit. If I could suck the words back in, I would. There’s no doubt in my mind the fact she’s a vampire has colored my opinion of her. And every detail of what she does. I immediately regret asking, but Vince doesn’t take offense. Thank God.
“Like it? I love it.” He smiles like a proud kid who just won a spelling bee and grabs a soda. Lev snorts a laugh and Jude chuckles.
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. I fucking love it when she calls me pup.”
“Isn’t it like … a little degrading?” I can’t help but to ask.
“What’s your favorite color?” A broad smile spreads across his face as he leans against the granite counters.
“What?”
“What’s your favorite color?” He repeats his question with strained humor.
“Purple.”
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why is it your favorite color?” A smug look crosses his face.
I nod as I pick up on the point he’s making. “There doesn’t have to be a reason.”
“Exactly.” He claps his hands loud in front of him.
“Don’t you feel disrespected, though?” His brow furrows and a small frown pulls his lips down. Maybe I pushed too far. Damn my stupid mouth. He finally shakes his head.
“Not at all. I’m earning her pleasure.” His smile returns. “And she’s earning my trust. Fuck, she has my trust. I know she’s going to take care of me.” Lev and Jude choke out a laugh again as he tosses the belt back over his shoulder. “Fucking thing keeps getting in my way, though.”
“It’s just like you and Dev. Isn’t it?” Lev asks. My eyes narrow. Fuck no, this isn’t like us at all. “He’s earning your trust, isn’t he?”