Hold You Against Me (Stripped 4)

Part of me wonders what would have happened if I hadn’t joined him tonight. Would he have kissed that girl? Would he have had sex with her? What bothers me most is how little that worries me. I know there’s something toxic in our relationship, but toxic is all I know.

He grabs my wrist. Then the world is tilting sideways as he drags me onto his lap. I let out a small squeak before settling on his thighs. This close, I can smell the sweat on him, the faint musk of grass from the field. It’s not unpleasant, exactly. It’s just a little too intimate for comfort.

As is the erection pressing into my ass. I squirm to get back on solid ground.

He wraps his arm around my waist like an iron bar on a roller coaster. “Where you going, babe?”

“Yeah, babe,” Rick says, smirking. Everything dumb and dangerous that Shane has done while we’ve been together has been with Rick at his side. Bad influence doesn’t begin to cover it, but it’s not my place to tell Shane who his friends should be.

“Please don’t call me that.”

I know better than to challenge him, and sure enough, his lips widen. It’s not a nice smile, especially when you factor in the calculation in his eyes. “Your girl needs to lighten up,” he says, his gaze trained on mine.

“Yeah,” Shane says, voice low. He’s too busy feeling me up to realize we are wading into danger. He has one hand groping my ass, the other playing with the neckline of my dress.

“Stop,” I whisper, but of course he doesn’t hear me. It’s way too loud for that. I scan the crowd, hoping Amy will magically appear. Maybe that’s cowardly of me, but I just want this night to end without a fight.

As if Rick reads my mind, he asks, “Where’s the smurfette?”

He calls her that because her hair was blue when they first met. Since then it’s been pink, purple, teal, and every color under the rainbow.

“I don’t know,” I say because I don’t really. She might be at the front of the club, flirting with the bouncer. Or he might have taken a break and found some empty office for them to make out. Either way, I’m not sending Rick in their direction.

His eyes narrow. “I know she came with you.”

Crap. “She went to the bathroom.”

Rage flashes over his face—he doesn’t like being lied to, but most of all, he hates that Amy isn’t interested in him. She likes to rebel, but she’s not stupid.

Shane grows bold enough to push his hand inside my dress and stroke my breast.

My whole body goes stiff. I grab his wrist. “Stop.”

“Fuck,” he mumbles, his face buried in my hair. He’s hard as a rock underneath me, almost rolling his hips into me. This is bad. He’s too far gone to say no right now, and if we were doing this at my apartment, I might have to go along with it. But we’re not in my apartment. We’re in the back of the club. As much as I’m trained to avoid conflict, I can’t let him undress me in public.

“Shane, I mean it. Stop that.”

“Why should he stop?” Rick says, his voice taunting. “It’s nothing he hasn’t done before, right?”

Oh no, this is bad. I figured Shane wouldn’t tell anyone that we haven’t had sex yet. It might make people question his virility. Maybe it sounds weird, but I’m fine with everyone assuming I’ve put out even if I haven’t. Except the way Rick’s eyes have lit up, he must know we haven’t.

Shane’s body tenses, his fingers tightening on my ass and on my breast. “Shut the fuck up.”

Maybe I should be glad my boyfriend is finally sticking up for me, even though I know it’s more about himself. But my conditioning kicks in. I stroke his arm, trying to soothe. “Don’t worry about him. Let’s get out of here. Let’s just go.”

He’s still taut with anger, with frustration. “Why do you fucking do this to me?” he says, bitter and sharp. For a moment I think he knows how toxic we are together.

I think he hates it too.

“Too fucking uptight to spread your legs,” he adds, and my hope withers.

“We’ll go back to my place,” I say, placating. This feels like a pot boiling over, and I’m desperate to remove the heat. So what if I have to sleep with my boyfriend to do it. Girls do that all the time. At least that’s what I tell myself.

He rocks his erection into me, and I know it’s working.

I close my eyes for a moment. This is how it will be, the throbbing rhythm, the darkness. With my eyes closed I can pretend he’s someone else. Best of all, I can pretend I’m someone else.

“You’ve waited this long, man,” Rick says, breaking into my fantasy. “Why stop now?”