There are questions I want to ask him. Things I need to say.
But I don’t want him to move his hand, so I continue sucking, taking my reward for being such a good girl. I let him touch me. You have to give in. And I do that, if only for one night. That’s how I fall asleep, with his steady breathing as my lullaby, his thumb caressing my cheek, his fingers resting on my tongue.
Chapter Twelve
I dream of volcanos, of giant explosions and the drifting of ash. I see red molten rivers that turn black. The earth cracks open, swallows us whole, reclaiming what it had lost.
I feel the singe of my skin, smell burned flesh. I hear the screams—and I sit up.
My screams. I pant, trying to gather myself. I heard myself scream. The sheets are tangled around my waist. The room is empty. I wait in the inky night, almost expecting Ivan to burst in the room. Won’t he have heard me?
Maybe he’s deep in sleep. Or more likely, maybe his bedroom is far away from here, on the other side of this massive house wit
h thick walls. His room is on the third floor. I know that much, but he never let me in there. Not in the year that I lived here, and sure as hell not last night. The first and only time I tried to explore it as a naive sixteen-year-old, I actually got lost. When Ivan found me, he sternly marched me downstairs with strict instructions never to return.
He treats me like a child, and I obey him, because I like it.
I still like it, but not enough to stay.
I need more than that.
Part of me is disappointed he didn’t hear. I want to see what he’d do to comfort me, what else he might give me to suck. Another part of me knows this is for the best. This is my chance.
I cross the room and find my cell phone in the pocket of my jeans. The light blinds me for a second before I can make a call.
One ring. Two.
“Hello?”
“Clara. It’s me. Candy.”
“Yeeeah,” she says, drawing out the word, sounding distracted. “They have this thing called caller ID. I saw it was you before I answered.”
“Mhm, thanks for the technology lesson, but actually I need your help with something else.”
I can feel her attention snap to me over the line. “Something wrong?”
That means she hasn’t heard about the blood at the Grand. That’s good. If she knew, she might be more inclined to side with Ivan about this. “I need you to pick me up from Fourth and Lennox in twenty minutes.”
“Are you in trouble? Should I bring Kip?”
Clara is the little sister of Honor, one of the girls who used to dance at the club. When Honor got into trouble, Clara spent a couple of hours at the Grand under my questionable supervision. We struck up something resembling a friendship, even though I have no business talking to someone that innocent. Not anymore.
Kip is Honor’s very protective, very dangerous husband. He’d be only too happy to protect me, but it would put them all at risk.
It would also eventually get back to Ivan.
“Tell no one,” I say, doing my best stern-elder impression. Even though I’m only one year older than her.
“Okay, Ms. Mysterious. I’ll be there.”
“Are you coming from home? Head down I-32 and exit at—”
“They also have this thing called maps. Like on phones. And—”
“Smart-ass,” I say, but I can’t help but smile. Even in the midst of all this, deep in the heart of a torn up city, she’s a breath of fresh air.
I hang up with a sense of anticipation and dread. Anticipation because I have a lot to do in twenty minutes. I have to sneak out of Ivan’s house, which is almost as hard as sneaking in. Of course I have the advantage of knowing most of his pass codes and Luca’s habits.