Forever (Fallen 3)

“The night of the battle, after I proposed.”

“Jonathon,” he said and just his saying my name spoke volumes.

“I know.”

“If she hadn’t lost the baby, she would have died in childbirth.”

“I know, Patrick,” I growled. I didn’t want to hear this. I hated him knowing how much of a failure I was. I couldn’t keep it in my pants and look where it had led us.

“I’m not judging you Jonathon. You have to pave your own way and make your own mistakes.”

“It wasn’t a mistake,” I snapped. “Nothing with Kylie has ever been a mistake. I don’t regret any of it.”

“I’m not saying you should,” he spoke softly.

“Aren’t you?” I said looking at him and away from Kylie’s frail body.

“Jonathon,” he said softly, “you’re a good man. I love you like you were my own son and I love Kylie like a daughter. You both have to have your own life. You have to do what makes you happy. But this Jonathon…this was a big risk you took.”

“I know. I told her everything you told me, but it didn’t matter. We were ready.”

“But were you ready to be parents? Were you ready to kill yourselves?”

“Stop it, just stop it, Patrick. I don’t want to think about it. To think about that would be to think about her dead.”

“But that’s what would have happened if she had the baby. It would have killed her and you would have been left alone, devastated, with your child.”

“I would have went crazy like Selena,” I whispered. “You would have to kill me.” I looked up at him. “If something happens to Kylie, you have to kill me, Patrick.”

“Don’t you dare, Jonathon. Don’t ask me that.” His jaw was tight.

“I have to Patrick. Please, if anything happens to Kylie,” I swallowed. “Please kill me. Don’t let me become a monster like Selena. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

Patrick looked stricken. Many emotions raged a war across his face, anger, sadness, grief. “If I have to I will,” he spoke softly.

“Thank you,” I lowered my head in relief. “I’d rather you did it.”

“I can’t talk about this anymore,” he said, looking forlorn. We’d had had this discussion before. With Kylie choosing to stay human it meant my death. If she died, when she died, be it today or eighty years from now, I would lose my mind. Losing your soul mate meant a death sentence for a vampire. It was rare, but it happened, like with Selena. Kylie’s and mine’s situation was completely unheard of. The human always wanted to turn after they found their soul mate. Not Kylie, s

he was different, we were different.

I turned back to Kylie. I couldn’t believe this had happened. It was like fate was trying to tear us apart. I put my head on the hospital bed. I was far from exhausted thanks to being a vampire. This was the worst night of my immortal life. This was worse than the night I became a vampire, the thought of losing her, my soul mate, tore me to pieces. We’d had so many close calls already. Just when I thought I had her, fate decided to show me that she was far from mine. She was human and she was fragile.

“Do you want me to stay with you?” Patrick asked.

I shook my head, “I’ll be fine.”

“I’ll stay.”

“Patrick,” I growled.

“You need me Jonathon.”

“Then why did you ask?”

“I wanted to be polite,” a smile played on his lips. “I’ll go tell the others her condition and send them home.” He started towards the door.

“Patrick?” I asked. He stopped and looked back at me with a raised eyebrow. “Could you not tell them about the baby and the um… other stuff.”