“I have money; we can fight him—”
I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes and let out a humorless laugh. “Money won’t solve this.”
“So money can solve his problems, but not ours?” Liam shouted, gesticulating wildly.
“It’s not our problem. It’s mine. Stay out of this, Liam. I mean it,” I said with as much force as I could. “You don’t understand what he’s capable of.”
How could he? He hadn’t seen everything I had.
“He’ll do whatever it takes to shut you up, do you understand me?” I pointed a finger at him like he was an unruly child I was scolding.
“What did he do to you?” Liam whispered, his shoulders sagging as all the fight seemed to leave him.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “What didn’t he do?” My voice was as soft as his. “I don’t want to hurt you, Liam. I really don’t, because I love you, but I don’t know if I can do this.” My chin trembled as I inhaled a hiccup of air. “You and me, this isn’t good for either of us. I’m too fucked up, and I can’t drag all this darkness into your life, not when you’re finally happy.”
His face fell, and in a broken voice, he whispered, “I’m only happy because of you.”
“Please, don’t say that,” I begged, shaking my head back and forth.
“It’s the truth.”
I backed in the direction of my room. “When we get back to California I’m packing my bags, and I’m leav—”
“No,” he spat the word, glaring at me, “you can’t leave because of this. This doesn’t change anything.”
“It changes everything.” I couldn’t continue putting his life in danger. I loved him too much to stay. How could he not see that?
“Ari, please,” he said brokenly, starting toward me.
I held my hands up. “No,” I snapped harshly. “No, Liam. Focus on your competition tomorrow. That’s more important.”
“Fuck the competition.” He slashed his hands through the air. “You’re more important.”
“I’m not,” I cried brokenly. “Trust me, I’m not. I should’ve done this a long time ago before things got complicated.”
“Complicated?” he spat, latching onto the words. “What’s complicated about us loving each other?”
I tore at my hair. I was never going to be able to make him understand. “This isn’t easy for me! Can’t you see that?” My hands fisted at my sides in frustration. “But it’s what has to be done.”
“No. No, it’s not.” He shook his head and started for me.
I tried to run, but I wasn’t quick enough. He caught me around the waist and before I could make a sound he was kissing me. His lips moved against mine in a desperate dance. One I wouldn’t return. I hung like a limp noodle in his arms and when he pulled away, he whispered my name. “Ari?”
“This is over, Liam. I’m sorry.”
He let me go, a look of complete and utter despair on his face. He looked broken, and it pained me that I was the one to do that to him.
“I’m sorry,” I said one last time, and closed the door to my room.
He would never understand how true those words were. I’d never meant to hurt him. I’d never meant to get this close. And I’d certainly never meant to fall in love with him.
But I had.
And now I’d ruined everything.
***
Liam wouldn’t speak to me. I didn’t blame him. How could I?