“Fuck, man.” He scrubbed his hands roughly over his face. “The last two days have fucking sucked. I got a call from the hospital that Talia had been shot and was being rushed into emergency surgery, and then when I got here I heard someone say your name and I figured you’d been involved too. And Ari. And fuck, Rebecca and Darren are dead. They’re dead, Liam. And you and Talia almost died too. I’ve never been so scared before. So fucking helpless.” He grasped the end of the bed in his hands. “The girl I love is laying down there in ICU, fighting for her life, and I’m fucking praying for her to wake up. I’ve never prayed before, Liam, but I’m desperate. I’m also terrified for her to wake up, because when she does I’m going to have to tell her the baby didn’t make it, and that’s going to crush her.” A tear slid out of the corner of his eye. “She was so excited. Me too. And now I have to tell her that the baby is gone. The names we talked about, the future we dreamed of for our child…it’s all fucking gone.” Another tear. “How could this happen?” He nodded at me. “Why?” He chuckled, but there was no humor in the tone. “Well, I kind of know why. This story has been all over the news. Was Ari really kidnapped by that dude?”
I nodded.
“Fuck, this is some crazy shit.” He rubbed at his head. “Doesn’t seem real, you know?” He straightened then. “I just wanted to see you with my own two eyes, make sure you were okay.” He jerked his chin at my injured shoulder. “If you’re worried about being able to surf again I know you will. You’re a fighter. You won’t let this stop you.”
Funnily enough, I hadn’t thought once about my shoulder and how it could potentially damage my surfing career. Ari had been my main worry.
“All right, well, I’ll see you later. I need to get back to Talia’s room in case she wakes up.” He ventured closer and held out his closed fist for me to bump mine against.
He left, and a short time later a nurse and doctor came in.
“Hello, Mr. Wade,” the doctor said as he looked over my chart. “You could’ve been out of here sooner if we hadn’t needed to sedate you again.” He clucked his tongue in disapproval. “But we’re going to get you out of here now.”
The nurse began to check my vitals while the doctor consulted the clipboard.
“We’re going to advise that you wear the sling for four weeks, but depending on how fast you heal and if you take care of it properly, it could come off sooner. The bullet nearly nicked a major artery, Mr. Wade. You’re extremely lucky to be alive, so take it easy, okay?” He waited for me to nod. “As for your throat, your lymph nodes are extremely swollen and there is bruising around your neck. The swelling should go down in a few days, and with it, you’ll regain your voice. Also, ice your shoulder regularly to help with the healing and any stiffness you may have. You can use a bit of heat too, but don’t overdo it.”
I nodded at his words. Going home sounded like an excellent idea, and I hadn’t even been awake for most of my time there. I’d never liked hospitals, though.
“Everything looks good, so Jackie here is going to get the paperwork for you to sign and you’ll be out of here. Your friend brought you some clothes, too.” He showed me a black duffel bag sitting in the corner of the room. Smiling, he said, “I’m glad to see you’re not putting up a fight with us this time, Mr. Wade. Now, if you get home and feel like there’s something wrong with your shoulder, feel free to call the nurses’ station and someone will assist you. We’re giving you a prescription for some pain medicine to take home too, in case that shoulder gets too bad, but I’ll let Jackie go over all of that with you. Good luck, Mr. Wade.” With a nod, he exited the room and I was left with the nurse.
“Like the doctor said, everything looks good. I’m going to gather your release papers, and I’ll be back.”
She’d only been gone for a few minutes when my parents came back.
“They said you’re getting out?” My mom sounded hopeful.
I nodded. I was going to be a nodding pro by the time I got my voice back.
I felt exhausted, and my eyes began to grow heavy, but by the time I was almost asleep, Jackie was back with papers for me to sign. Then from there we waited a little longer for some other confirmation, and when that was given, my parents left the room so I could dress. Dressing with one arm should’ve been an Olympic sport; I’d broken out in a sweat by the time I was done.
When I opened the door, a man was waiting with a wheelchair to take me out to the car. I tried to refuse it, but apparently it was policy.
My mom waited with me at the hospital entrance while my dad went to get the car. A few minutes later, he pulled up in my Jeep and hopped out to help me in.
Once again, I didn’t need help, but I let him anyway because I knew it made him feel better.
When we got to my house, I half-expected Ari to be waiting, but she wasn’t. I was disappointed, but I tried not to let it show.
I headed up to my room and collapsed on my bed. Within minutes, I was asleep, but it was far from peaceful. Images of that night haunted me, but in them I was okay and Ari died. That was a reality I never wanted to contemplate. Not even in my sleep.
***
I stared out at the ocean as the sun rose above it. I was reminded of that morning with Ari, out on the paddleboard. It seemed like forever ago now, even though it had only been two weeks. A lot can happen in two weeks, in an hour, and in a minute. Lives can be shattered and others taken. I finally understood how vulnerable we are as humans and that not every breath is guaranteed to us. I would never take my life for granted again. I would never go back to that angry guy I was before Ari. I wouldn’t let this situation ruin me. I’d let stupid stuff destroy my life before, and I wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. I was going to let what happened to me make me a better more appreciative person.
Beneath the sunrise, I was reminded of the promise of a new day.
A new beginning.
A new chance to make things right.
I hadn’t seen Ari in the days since I’d been home. No one had.
I didn’t know where she was, what she was doing, and whether or not she was safe. It was fucking killing me.
I regretted turning my back on her, basically setting her out on the street.
She was the girl I loved, and I gave up. I didn’t fight. I walked away.